is this thing for real

nothing much has been going on the past few, i had another bad date, well not bad per se, but not promising, not sure those things go hand in hand. Anyway, tonight I have to go to NY for a friend's wedding. I'm wearing my roomates dress which is a little tight so instead of sitting on my ass here and typing this out, i should be at the gym, trying to make this thing look more flattering. oh well, anyway, I'm taking the red eye and plan to drug myself up with ambien to make sure I fall asleep instead of being kept awake by the overweight person next to me who hogs all the room, particularly the arm rest. Did you know that they have seat belt extendors?? Now, like I said I'm no slim jim but If i'm asking the flight attendant for a seat belt exetendor, i'd like to think i'd take a good hard look at my life and think maybe it's time to dial back on the doritos if you knwo what i'm saying.