STAR SIGHTINGS

yesterday at the coffee bean in bev hills, I saw renee zwellegger. She is super super skinny, like ridiculous. and she talks like a baby. HELLO YOU'RE A GROWN WOMAN. what also annoyed me was how the employees there were like "do you want a carrier for your drinks" do you need this do you need that? anything esle, anything to eat? SERVICE I DO NOT GET FYI!!

then this morning at the coffee bean near my house I saw Kristin Chenoweth from the west wing and from Wicked, cause i loved her in wicked. Anyway, she too is skin and bones!! And she's so tiny that I looked like a monster standing next to her.

WHO WANTS TO GUESS HOW MUCH AN APPENDECTOMY COSTS!!!!

ACCORDING TO MY CEDARS SINAI ONLINE STATEMENT (I WAS ON FOR MY COLONOSCOPY BILL) AND THEY HAVE MY SURGERY LISTED

SO FAR THE TOTAL IS.... $70,000 FOR MY 2 NIGHT/3 DAY HOSPTIAL STAY AND SURGERY

oh and to make it more interesting I gave my insurance card in the ER, i gave my insurance card to the hospital (after being admitted) and guess what, the cedars billing dept. say I'm a self paying person with no insurance. ahh. so the adventure begins with insrance. glad i had my insurance card on me, lot of good it did me!

so like i said when i was in the hospital pieces of my lung collapsed. I just read an article in a very sophisticated magazine People, about a girl who invented a device that helps kids in hosptials after surgeries strenghthen their lung by shooting marhsmallows. Now that I know how scary it can be to lose lung capacity (and i will know more when I'm allowed to run again in a few weeks) I wanted to post the site if anyone wanted to make a donation.

www.kelseyskids.org

sounds like a great organization.

my meeting went very well yesterday, i think i got the job, now i'm nervous that i can't do the job! we shall see...

the person in question was very well put together, very nice, pitched a few things. all in all it was fun.

last night i went to a party for the season 2 premiere of who wants to be a superhero. due to my health i could ony stay for like an hour, but enough time to say hello to the people who invited me and introduce my friend who is a huge comic book guy to the all time comic book guy in the history of comic books who I know because of this project.

wow, i only live like 1.5 miles from the wrtiers guild, my commute was 6 minutes! That is going to save me $$ on gas which is good since my rent more than doubled i need that savings somewhere. I guess I could just stay at hoome and work from my office, but that will get lonely if i did that every day. at least at the writers guild lounge i occasionaly run into friends. i'm not getting my tv hooked up until the tv season starts up again in the fall, so last night i actually worked in my office!! love having an office!

so i'm off the antibiotics they gave me for my surgery and they dont really allow you to sleep, so i haven't been getting a ton of sleep as a result, but last night my first day off I went to bed at 1030pm and slept until 830am. guess i needed it because i started working again and i've got a lot going on. eek

nothing else to report except I've lost like 7 pounds since my surgery and put on a shirt this morning that had been in storage the entire time and it's falling off me! sexy time!

i like to go to the best but didn't.

Just read on the aOL homepage that cedars sinai the hospital where i got my surgery last week is 17th in the country with UCLA as #3. Oops, guess I should've gone there. Although i had such a sweet set up at cedars and everyone (except one nurse) was amazing.

oh and before i forget, tomorrow I'm meeting with a certain someone to talk about a project. dont' want to type anything that could be found on google, so let's just say before I was born my parents lived in Paris...










here are pics of my new apt. sorry about the not having furniture. it;s getting there. love the hardwood floors.

ok so i dont know what order thess are in, so i'll just write about my tv being swallowed by the wall, dont worry the big hutch i have by the dining room table is going to move where the tv stand is now so it wont get so swallowed. i'm going to get an area rug for the living room and move the pottery barn rug there now under the dining room table (thanks for carrie frymer for coming up with that ingenius plan)






my beds not made but i can't make it right now since i'm infirmed. or at least that's what i like to think. the built in bookshelves are my fave, sorry it's turned to the side, i'm too lazy to fix it. i have a patio (not accessible directly from the apt, but you just exit my door and it's right there) so it would be perfect as a smoking patio, if i still smoked (i never realllly smoked to begin with, but gave it up for new years and glad i did as it slows your recovery from surgery!)

i love my new pad

my new pad rules. it really really does! I love it so much i miss it right now. i'm at the writers guild thinking about why im' not working in the office at my new apt. it's huge, i'll take pics, but so far 4 of my friends have given it their seal of approval.

carrie and danielle came over yester. afternoon to help me unpack since I can't really lift anything significant. so a lot of stuff is already put away. and remi and carrie came over and brought wine and gifts for me!!! and we ordered yummy pizza and drank and talked about how great my apt. is!!! hehehehe!!

I LOOOOVE IT! I can't believe I didn't move out of bruno's years ago, what was I thinking. I LOVE LIVING ALONE IN MY SUPER AWESOME PAD!!!!

if life hands you lemons... but what if you are a lemon

If you live in cali, you have heard the following commericial on the radio, if not we have a dealership called Toyota of Orange that has this jingle: Chorus: "No you won't get a lemon!" Extremely Enthusiastic guy: "I WOULDN'TA GOT A LEMON? ...

so i've started to reflect on my current situtaion, no not the being unemployed, single and homeless one, my health crisis. and i'm starting to think that my parents should've gotten me at toyota of orange so as not to have gotten a lemon. I am a lemon, not me per se, but my body is a lemon. I'm not going to list all my ailments that have lead me to believe this, but i'll give just this years examples:

I had 3 colon pollyps and had to have them removed by colonoscopy, a diagnosis which tends to befall men in their 50s. my doctor even said it's rare someone my age would have them

then the appendicitis in july. AND THAT'S JUST 2007.

i wont go into 2004 when they thought i had a brain tumor in my pituitary gland becausse I stopped having my period for 9 months and didn't produce a baby.

or in 1999 when I had e. coli and was so sick that i couldn't go out for an entire year because if i went out, i'd get a cold for 2 weeks and then becasue the e coli went on so long i developed asthma. and I'm leaving out the parasite from africa and the gallstone i have living inside me. even my surgeon on saturday night after having reviewed my file and all my medical problems told me I'm a mess. he said that when we go in it's going to be interesting as they're not 100% sure what they'll be taking out as a result of my colitis, polycystic ovarian syndrome and gallstone and probable appendicits.

so yeah, i'm starting to think i must be a lemon.

on the bright side i have great friends and a great sonicare toothbrush.

while i was in surgery

at literaly the exact moment of my surgery, this is what my friends were doing outside of the hosptial as they happened to be wasted at a bar across the street (with drew barrymore whos not in the picture)

please notice they're all grabbing the wrong side of the belly

so much better

today is a good day. yesterday i wokep up and still felt very shitty and ate a lot of percoset. i took a nap and just layed around. apprently that is the exact opposite of what i'm supposed to be doing. i talked to my surgeon and he yelled at me for napping and also wouldn't =change my anti biotic perscription. anyway, so i got out and walked for 45 mins and then walked again later that night for 15 mins. and then today i woke up feeling great! i'm serious. so today i've already walked and met a friend for lunch, i only ate one egg white and a piece of toast (ive totally lost like 4 pounds)

i'm going to walk to kristin's today about 2 miles round trip to get my drivers license which is in my car and i need to get onto warner bro studios tonight as i'm going to see HARRY POTTER!!!!! WOO HOO!!!!!

my friend amy is coming too as i need a chauffer as i'm not allowed to drive until friday. also big news, i took myself off percoset today, i'm on acetominphen, basical tylenol.

i have a very busy couple of days coming up as i have to pick up a parking permit for my new neighborhood in order to park there on sunday night and guest passes as christie is gonna be in town and stay next weekend. oh and i need to get the lights turned on! must have that happen too.

ok, i've had the worst couple of days. I'll keep it real brief for now as I'm drugged and eshausted. I had an emergency appendectomy at 11PM saturday night. It was the most pain i have ever had. will fill in details later. then this morning around 5am my temp. shot up crazy high apparently due to a parial lung collapse... SAY WHAT? yeah, pieces of my lung had collapsed which is common after surgery i guess. I wasn't doing enough lung excercises, even though i was (remy and carrie saw me doing them immediatey after I got out of surgery sunday at 1am.) They rocked and hung out until like 3am talking to me which was so amazingly nice since I was still freaked out from having surprise major surgery.

anyway, i was released tonight and i'm staying at my friend greg and amy's who are taking good care of me and even cooked me dinner and put water by my bed! so sweet. okay, i'll fill in all the details tomorrow as I can't really do anythig other than lie in bed and occassionally walk around to avoid another lung collapse. p.s. if you talk to my parents do not mention the lung thing, i happened to leave that out as my mother would have fallen over dead if she heard it!1

last night i saw the nmovie evening. it was boring and not very good. sorry meryll streep.

i stayed over at carrie's cause i'm house sitting and i brought some laundry. she has a kick ass machine. I'm going to be very sad when I dont have private laundry facilities.

the old roomate asked me to come get my mail becauswe "it's accumulating." so i thought, sure, it's been 3 weeks since my last mail pick up and if he's emailing me, there must be a ton of mail! so i drive up there and the door was open and the actor and his fiancee were there with friends playing a game andi didn't say hi cuase they annoy me, but they had tied the mail onto the door, and i coujldn't get it off so they heard me and i ran away. so i think to myself, this bag is light for mail that has been "accumulating," so i get it to carrie's house and open the bag and it contains the following: 1 brochure from my mutual fund and 3 envelopes. THAT'S ACCUMULATING??!?!?

i drove all the way up there for that? he's so annoying! 4 pieces of fucking mail!! the last time it was a huge pile and i emailed him about it, this time he initiates it and tghere's nothing! I HATE HIM!

today was just one of those annoying days. I had to get up early (815am gasp) and head to my storage unit. actually not mine, but my friend jeff's. I had my movers from a couple of weeks ago clear out jeff's unit, drive it to his fam's new house then drove to their old house and picked up really nice furniture for me to move into their storage unit until i move next weekend. Then i got the bad news that my movers couldn't move me next weekend so i had to track down other, MORE EXPENSIVE ones. they coul move me fri (can't move in that early) or monday, but if you've ever driven from the valley into LA on a week day morn, you know it's not a fun trip. So early next sunday at 7am I'm meeting my movers at my now TWO storage units to empty them both out to move into my apt. MY NEW APT!! i also got a couch and coffee table and dining set for the new place too on monday that i ordered!! i'm so fucking psyched!!!

anyway jeff and his wife (my old bossses) gave me some seriously sweet shit, they spare no expense on their stuff so i got an awesome desk (that was in their 4 year olds room but still, it's nice) a handpainted credenza that will match my couch perfectly, a beauru that might actually be used as an entertainment center, 2 really sweet night stands (now i can get rid of the one i had been using, stacey u know the one, i actualy might use it for an end table for the time being) a solid lamp, and a desk chair! and these awesome storage bins that were under the desk. i'll take pics of my new place as soon as i move in sunday week.

but the gross thing about my movers which is why i'm actually glad i'm getting new ones is the guy who runs the business. he kept hugging me last time I hired them and hitting on me, well this morning, he hugged me a lot, SUCKLED ON MY NECK!!!!! SERIOUSLY and grabbed my FUCKING ASS!! then put his arms around me while i was walking in front of him and buried his head into the back of my neck (all this behavior was repeated throughout the entire 3 hours) so even though these other movers will probably be costing me $200 more than the regular ones, at least i wont be getting a little raped!

oh and then i came back to kristin's and completely cleaned her fridge she's giving me for my new place. like it was disgusting and been in her garage for 3 years, I hope it actually still works. so i had to clean it before i move it next week, oh yeah, my movers will have to drive to her place (on the way actually) to pick up the fridge and load that in to!! sunday the 15th is going to SUUUUUUUCK!!

oh and now the teeth that the denstist was trying to get a closer look at vis a vis the dentist debaucle of my last post ARE FUCKING HURTING!!! how is that possible! he was lookig for something b/c he asked that those teeth get a new picture specifically and now the teeth hurt even though he said all clear after seeing it! I HAVEN'T RECIEVED A PAY CHECK IN 19 MONTHS!! I CAN'T HAVE A DENTAL NIGHTMARE!!

i had a fit at the dentist the other day. basically i'm a bitch. if i think someone is not as smart as me, i have no patience with them, who do i think i am? the woman who does the xrays with this new machine that shows them digitally IMMEDIATELY was trying to get this one root and it wasn't working and she kept taking them over and over and over and over, 6 times and finally i said "uh, what is going on? I'm freaking out about the amount of radiation. and i insisted she stop. then she said i get more radiation from the sun and I said I never go in the sun and she siad it's barely any radiation and it's not like i get alot any way and then i said well, every single household electronic emits radiation, so in fact, on top of the amount i got sitting there i'm also getting it from everythign around us all day long every day! she went and tattled on the dentist and then i said I will take one more if she can fucking do it right (did not use fucking) but still, (at this point she had already taken 4 more)

so she readjusted it again and got it, and i left in a total huff, probably glowing radioactively as i exited. i just got annoyed because she just seemed dumb and like i said, i'm a superior bitch.

License to wed premiere party was on monday night and my loyal WB friends hooked me up once again. I know I'm now on the premiere party circuit, but I still get such a kick as my mother woudl say, going to these things. they never get old to me, how is that possible? I got so jaded working on a tv show, oh it's friday we're taping again, snore. but going to premiere parties, woohooo bring it on!

had the best time at this one. the movie was not so hot, but the party was hilarious. I told one guy i didn't eat pork because i was kosher and he goes "ew," and steps away from me like I said i was contagious. clearly he didn't know what kosher meant.

i danced from one of the party to another because kristin bet me i wouldn't so i made a whopping ten bucks, although i had so much fun doing it, that i told her she didn't have to pay me, but she was true to her word.

at the party they had a couple of actors dressed up as bride and groom roaming the party and kristin and i had a drink with them, so freaking hollywood it was hilarious. I tried to hit on carrie's co-worker but got rejected so harsh!

sorry i haven't written in a week. so much to catch up on! well last wed. i went out on another bad date, not like the date was bad, more like the guy was not cute at all, i know i'm such a bitch, and he talked at me for 2 hours straight and it seemed like he wanted to hang out all night, i'm like no, i do 90 min first dates, point blank period.

then i had another first date sunday night and this guy was SOOO NOT CUTE ugh! both of these guys have emailed me already and asked me out again and i feel bad aas i dont wnat to hurt thier feelings, i've had my feelings hurt and it sucks balls. i also feel like such a bitch like "oh look at me every guy is so ugly and they want me so bad." if you know me you know that's not what i'm thinking.

had a 2nd date last night with... bike. that's obviosuly not his real name, clearly i changed one letter. anyway, it was at a cute restuarant in marina del rey, kind of a drive for me, but it looked nice online so i agreed. It was good. the date was nice, conversatoin flowed more naturally than the 1st date, he's cute, but a little rough around the edges in terms of not being as sweet as i like 'em. I usually like/date sweet guys and bike seems to carry himself in a defensive way, not like argumentative or anything like that, but just the things he sasy. also he was 10 mins late which wouldn't have been a big deal had he not be 30 mins late for our 1st date and then told me last night a stoyr about a fight he got into with his brother this weekend because he was really late and his brother said "you're always late' and he got all bent out of shape and woudon't apologize for it.

hmmm. this is a deal breaker as I am not a person who indulges said behavior.

okay so tonight i'm supposed to have a 2nd date with this guy who i crank called. he might have to work, but if not we're getting together. i'm not sure how psyched I am about this, see first dates are totally easy as i have no expectations and could care less either way. But now 2nd dates are where things start to get complicated. upon further review this guy didn't really talk much well, that's not true more aCcurately he would answer questions very briefly and then we'd have long moments of me in my head going... okay this is awkward.

i talked to him on the phone last night and these moments took place again, taht's what jogged my memory of our first date.

Grrrr, dating sucks. anyway, i'm going into it with an open mind as i've given 2nd dates to guys who have deserved it much less. hey you never know.

tomorrow night i have another first date with a guy named... i'll have to look it up, anyway, we met on ehar. and have since moved to our own email accounts and i have no idea what he looks like as my acct. at ehar is turned off and now can't access pictures. this should be interesting...

i'm dogsitting for my friend carrie this weekend which means I have to get up early to feed the dog and take it for a walk. Not a fan of these responsibilities!

Just went to jenny craig and i'm disappointed because I only lost one fucking pound. one pound! I guess i should've expected that b/c i did eat more than i've eaten ever this week. but it's weird my clothes fit so oooo much better so i was suprised that i only lost one pound but can we please talk about something. every time i dont have a big loss, people at weight watchers or now jenny craig is "you probalby put on muscle." I'M NOT PUTTING ON ANY FUCKING MUSCLE! I'VE BEEN working out every day for 8 years, and you dont all of a suddenly start adding muscle. it's not muscle, i did not gain muscle, the lady at the craig today is ike "wow you work out every day you probalby put on muscle," lady, look at my biceps, look at my triceps does it look like i have a ton of muscle here, no!" seriously, stop saying it!

last night went to domiicks and had a great time, met this cute guy who I forced to take my number... i swear he didn't even ask for it, i just told him he had to take it b/c we were tgoing to be friends b/c he and i are moving 2 blocks from each other next month. He told me hes going to have a party after he moves in, which i hope he said that b/c he inteneded to invite me. I also mentioned I had a date today, maybe to make him see how desireable I am.

speaking of desireable, yesterday I was in traffic, scrolling through my weeks missed calls. I saw my friend liz's number so i hit talk and a guy picked up. I hung up thinking, that's weird, and then i realized... the guy who i went out with on thurs. night has the same first 3 digits as liz and i had just called him, heard his voice, waited for a second and then hung up. Yeah, i totally pranked the cute guy and now i'm sure he thinks i'm fucking psycho and will never call me again. so heres the thing do i send him an email now explaining what happened or do i say my phone calle dyou accidently or do nothing? it doesn't matter really, he totally thinks i'm koo-koo.

anyway, excited for my date at the skirball center today!

wednesday night i went out with this guy who looked like herman munster, a less cute version of herman. he was super nervous, wouldn't look me in the eye and was not a very good converstaionlist. i like to give guys a 2nd chance but not so much this one. at the end of the date, he walked me to my car and said "so do you want me to call you?!" ahhhhh no! i said yes.

last night i had another first date (same place, diff guy) and it went much better, save for the fact that i was so hyper from my insane bootcamp class yester eve. i def. made him think i was a total spaz! i woudl def. go out with him again if he asked cause he was cute and easy to talk to.

I have another first date on sunday afternoon at the skirball center, going to see some play that he is producing for NPR. meeting him early before hand.

also jenny craig update, i' totally losing weight!!!!!!

I WON!!

friday i was feeling very blue and while driving by a 7-11 i decided to stop in to get a lottery ticket, the day wasn't going well, so i thougth what a perfect time to buy a ticket.

and i did, in fact i bought 3, 1 quick pick and 2 i did on my own, Well, i'm proud to announce that i'm california's newest lottery winner. My winnings totally - ONE DOLLAR!

dont worry, it hasn't changed me.

grey hairs

so i've noticed in the past mmonths that i have more and more grey hairs, I think the stress of the past year has manifested itself on ruining my beautiful mahogany hair, like it's getting bad, just now i was in the bathroom and i have 3 grey hairs sprouting right in the front of my head, for all to see. the other hairs are in the back or on the side. so i googled going grey and this is what anderson cooper, my 2nd gay boyfriend (stephen fry the english comedian being my first gay boyfriend and he's actually come out as gay unlike anderson) said about going gray early.

"Going gray is like ejaculation. You know it can happen prematurely, but when it actually does, it's a total shock."

love him.

although also in his article on grey hair is this:

"Did you know that according to legend, the guy who became Buddha decided to seek enlightenment the day he got a touch of gray? "Gray hairs," the would-be Buddha said, "are like angels sent by the god of death."

Translation: Gray is nature's way of whispering "You're dying."

goodness my life is dull. I have nothing to report today. yesterday i did the usual, ate jenny craig, went to the gym, walked around the grove and the barnes and noble last night and went to bed. Oh i also "winked" at a lot of guys on the onion dating website. no winks back just yet.

today I'll do much of the same. I have to write a little treatment for a show i'm being pitched by MTV for a certain incarcerated celebrity... i have a conference call tomorrow morning about it. allegedly, as they keep changing it, which is annoying.

so on day one of jenny craig i realized that you have to eat a lot of food. I hate eating food. i hate food! so at the end of the day i had to eat 3 servings of fruit that i didn't want to eat. I guess i dont eat enough maybe that's why i dont lose weight. I swear if i eat all this fucking food they're forcing down my throat and gain weight, i will go ballistic!!!!

watched teh sopranos finale last night with remi and carrie, i liked it even if people didn't. I just didn't get the whole meadow parking her car scenes.

I think i have 2 dates this week from guys on the internet. One from a guy who was cute in his original picture but then changed pictures mid-conversation, and now he's not so cute, but i'll get coffee with him. have to get coffee since i cant eat anything other than jenny craig right now and am not supposed to be drinking.

so tentatively i have dates: wed, thurs, sun. so i guess that's 3 dates this week. woo hoo!

so i'm loving living with Krsitin, so much fun, love love. this weekend was her bday weekend and we went out to dinner last night, although I just came for drinks cause my pickiness was not conducive to the fixed menu. it was a great place, social hollywood, whihc used to be hollywood athletic club, great space. it was where the tv guide emmy party was last year too , shout out to suzy!! awww yeah!

today i joined jenny craig!!! i have given up on weight watchers as i think my portions are out of control even htough i eat healthier than anyone i've ever met. so they give me the food and portions and so far so good.

friday night i went over to grey and amys and had pizza and drank wine and then headed to 3rd stop with a big gang, but was tired and left around midnight.

i'm so excited for jenny craig, i really hope i lose like 15 pounds on this. I've recently met a ton of gals who have been really successful on it Today is day 1 and so far so good, granted the turkey burger ws delish but the size of a beer coaster, but still, i need to shake it up.

the paris hilton ordeal woke me up on friday early. I live in west hollywood right now and the about 5 blocks south of where she is on kings road, i'm one block from kings road and the choppers were in full effect, a ton of them just hovering around her house starting at like 6am, what a blasted nuisances! ah, what a glam life i lead being woken up by choppers as such

have you heard of the james morrison song?

it's called "wonderful world."

the lyrics go like this:

I know it's a wonderful world but I can't see it right now

this describes my state at this moment.

OCEANS 13 PREMIERE

last night ruled! well, yesterday was a rollercoaster day, not gonna lie. got up and had b'fast with kristin at kings road, then headed to the guild and wrote, then had lucnh with all my girlfriends, 3 have had babies in the past 2 months, one is a writer on scrubs, Kristin has a huge deal at fox, and erika's husband wrote wild hogs and they're sending her and her hubby on a 3 week tour of europe to do research for the sequel... suffice it to say, i pale in comparison to these v. successful ladies. the ladies witht the babies all have super $ hubbies, so i'm there no job, no place to live, no boyfriend, no baby, no new car, no fancy house NOTHING! I HAVE NOTHING!!

and i decide to go on suicide watch for myself. until... i go to see a screening of oceans 13, i love those movies, so much pretty to look at, and i love heist movies, i really do! then i got invited to the oceans 13 premiere party where I saw all the stars!!! OMG george clooney is ridiculous hot! he walked out with me (no we didn't go home together) and I was dying!!! i stopped and watched as he signed autographs and was in awe.

sarah silverman was tehre, i saw her show, i think it sucks, and jimmy kimmell, and i saw lloyd from entourage, and matt damon and the little guy who plays lewis and super dave osbourne and GEORGE FUCKING CLOONEY!!!!

woo hoo, drank free booze, ate fried bananas!!! woo hooo, love bananaS!!!

so excited cause tonight i'm going to see a screening of oceans 13. I didn't love oceans 12 b/c it was like brad pitt and george clooney self flaggelation fest on the screen, but there is so much pretty in this movie i hope i enjoy it.

so relieved i moved out of brunos, wish i did it months ago, what was i thinking? love living with kristin and her guest bed is so comf!

now i still need a job and am worried about my sanity taking a nose dive like it did last year. i still have no idea what i am doing with my life, but i ask you this, do any of us have that answer?

I DID IT

i'm all grown up!! i did it! i moved out of the actors house and found my own apt. No more actor and his crazy fiancee who was going around the house when my movers were there yesterday pointing out stuff i "forgot." I'm like I didn't forget it, ass, im moving out RIGHT NOW it's just not in the movers truck right now. SHE'S FUCKING CRAZY. so when i said "please dont' go around pointing stuff out until I'm actually done, she said "well i wanted to put something in there." she wanted to put something in the closet i hadn't even moved out yet, she got out of bed, heard the movers come in and decided to put something in my closet before I was done. Karina G. is fucking crazy!!

so i moved out and into storage and then when i came back to the house to pick up my luggage they had already moved furniture into my room!!!! and moved my bags around! I had been gone for an hour!!! so glad i'm done.

on top of that the actor wanted to charge me 3 days rent pro-rated for the 2 days I was tehre in june, i was like good luck prying that cash from my hands.

now i'm staying at kristin's until mid july!!

i need to find meaning in my life... it's quite bleak

no no, im not depressed again, it's just that I have no place to live, no job and no boyfriend/kids etc. It's really... horrid. But I guess they say, it's darkest before dawn.

And it's not that I just don't have a place to live, i'm trying desperately to move out, I've called 8 fucking places and only one of those places has called back?! huh? what's the point of listing your place if you're not wanting a tenant?

hopefully dawn is right around the corner! it really really needs to be. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying i have it the worst in the world, I'm not in darfur or new jersey (i hate NJ) but I think right now on may 30th 2007, I do have it pretty bad compared to what Ive had in the past. Contrary to what I'm lamenting about, I am not that bummed about my current situation, which is strange, you'd think I would be...

the actor's girlfriend is crazy and so annoying and rather stupid.

friday night i had a few people over like 8 to play cards, drink beer and watch TV at my hosue while the actor and his gf were out of town. It was mostlty my girlfriends liz and berna and rachel, kate, etc. so we hang out, play cards, drink and then go home early cause they came over at like 630 in the evening.

so the roomates come home last night, i'm at a movie, i get in around 11:45pm and the gF is sitting there like my parents and the first thing out of her mouth was "did you have a party," I said no, i had a few girlfriends over to play cards, then "who went into my room," i said i put the cats in the room and locked the door cause some of my friends smoke and i didn'tw ant the cat escpating. So she keeps saying "will you just tell me who was in our room," and i'm like NO ONE and she says again, just tell me and i'm like I'm sorry i dont know what to tell you, and she's getting all annoyed and she's like you're allowed to have a party... and i'm like it wasn't a party, it was people drinking beer and playing cards, aND she keeps calling it ap arty and did the people in the party go in her room caus the bed is ruffled and i'm like the cats probably ruffled the bed, and she goes into the party and if people at the party went in her room just tel her and i finally say, my friends know what its like for me to live here and they would never touch anything in this house without me signing off on it first. and then she sasy, what does that mean and i say, it just means it's actors house and he has very nice pieces that iw ouldn't get ruined... blah blah, so then i went to bed and then she immediatelly started getting ready for bed, b/c she had stayed up to attack me...

i am just waiting to be kicked out or get an email from bruno.

Those fucking cats were on that bed all weekend. and they run around that house and tear it up and knock stuff over, but if there are beer bottles and pizza boxes in the garbage, i'm the one who did all that stuff.


I am at the writers guilde right now just waiting to hear from the actor via email. thankfully i'll be here are day and then to bootcamp and then home real quick to change and watch the house finale with remi and carrie.

it has come to my attention that my parents, or my dad at least thinks that me not getting hired on a show is my fault... why i think this? I got an email from him yesterday with only this link.

http://hbswk.hbs.edu/item/4860.html

it's an article about your professinal image. so i wrote to him saying "why are you sending me a link about a professional image makeover?" to which he replied this:

During her trial the court asked Joan of Arc if she was in the State of Grace. They planned to trick her. If she said that she was not, she would be a self-confessed sinner deserving of punishment. If she said that she was in the State of Grace they were going to condemn her for pride and arrogance. Her answer was " If I am in the State of Grace, I pray that God keeps me there. If I am not in the State of Grace, I pray that God takes me there".

If your professional image is up to speed, may it stay up to speed. If it is not, may it get up to speed. Let me not be the one to judge. Since you recently did a relaunch (I realize this was a personal, not a professinal relaunch) I thought that this may be of interest.

x0x,
Dad

yesterday i barely ate just to be able to eat a ton at my friend carrie's for the finale of american idol. She made turkey meatball subs.... oh yummy, i'm serioulsy still full.

i have to work tonight, but hope to have time to stop by and seen the results show and eat some more turky yumminess, tonight's menu: turkey and bean chili.

yesteday i met over at disney, i guess the guy didn't like me cause my agent said there were some spots still avail on some of their shows, only to find out after the meeting there arent any avail, that's agent code for: he didnt like you so instead of me saying that, i'll just lie and say there was no shot on the shows anyway (shows that he told me earlier in the day were shots.) FUCK THIS INDUSTRY

talked to my nike friend who told me about a few options within her company, woo hoo that would be cool to move up to portland and work for Nike, shit i wear all their stuff anyway! wouldn't neve have to change my wardrobe.

i'm totally obsessed with stephen fry who used to be comedy partners with hugh laurie AKA house who i used to be obsessed with, but now i'm more obsessed with stephen, he's the one who did the bipolar documentary i told you guys about. anyway, he's in this new show over in the UK called kingdom, and i download the eps from somewhere every monday and watch them, and i have loved all of them, all 5 of them, the problem is the shows over there only go for 6 fucking episodes, so the seaosn is over just like that, what rot!

anyway, i'm on youtube daily to find stephen fry stuff, it's a little insane b/c im' totally cyber stalking him.

meanwhile, my old crush hugh laurie (who is still my crush, lets be honest) recieved some award from the queen today, as in the queen of england people, I have to say I have really great taste in men, high quality people I crush on!

busy

I am crazy busy and stressed this week. got a lot of work to do and i have a bunch of meetings for a variety of things. Shout out to stacey who has called me a few times, I'm gonna call you back after thurs. I swear!

No House on tonight, pushed the finale until next week cause of american idol. I'm heading to carrie's tonight for the AI finale, she's make turkey meatball sub sammys, I made stromboli last week!

I hate both finalists, melinda was my person, FUCK AMERICA! for voting her off.

the post it fairy

here are a few of the other post its the actor's girlfriend has left around the house in the past few weeks.

day bed

so i wrote this whole post last night and then my computer shut off, it's been doing that a lot lately, cannot be a good sign, right?

anyway, the actor roomate got this mostrosity day bed the other day. It's currently sitting outside my bathroom and when I asked him where they were going to display said day bed, he said it's going to be where the pool table is now standing. the pool table for those of you who dont know resides in the middle of this random downstairs room that no one goes to excpet me b/c my bathroom is down there. many of you have seen my place so know exactly where I'm talking about.

anyway, see the pic of this "day bed" that apparently "was a big hit" at the party they had at my house last night. oh did I not tell you,they had a party and didn't invite me, and they knew it was my birthday!


DAY BED



so see the picture of the day bed and then i have a picture of the room it's going in and buried under neath all the crap is the pool table in the middle of the room the other pic.

so this morning I was coming down and the actor was coming from downstairs with a blanket, i think he slept on the day bed or something, sometimes he gets up really early and relocates to the couch or now the atrotious day bed...

WHERE IT'S GOING SORRY IT'S TURNED TO THE SIDE.

update

I spoke with one of the agents just now and of the 2 shows I was still in the running for...

1. the head writer for one show has passed on me which sucks taht would've brought me back to NYC. why do i even dream?

2. the other show is probably going to hire these 2 guys she already has in mind. A woman head writer hiring male writers, i'm glad we're looking out for our own in 2007.

great way to start my birthday weekend... surrender hope all ye who enter...

I'm blue

I'm feeling a little blue today. Not sure why. However, I will mark it down on my mood chart. Oh yes, I just started a mood chart. I saw a special on manic depressives and this lady had a very complicated mood chart, so I downloaded one from the internets (as GW bush calls it), yes they really do have everything on the web. I am not manic depressive, but thought tracking my moods will be a good way to pass the time until i die seeing as God CLEARLY doesn't want me to have a family or a job, I figured this will be how I spend my days.

I realized watching this doc, which is so freaking good if you see it, by my gay, english boyfriend Stephen Fry, that all these manic depressives get to be high energy and manic while also being depresed. I on the other hand for those of you who have been reading this thing over the past year, know I only get depressed. I feel cheated. However, i do not envy these people, so dont get me wrong. I'd rather be only depressed than have to do deal with both... that's what I'm saying

anyway, i lost weight at weight watchers this week, 2.5 pounds so that's a good newsy sort of thing. going to the spa on sunday (my birthday) woo hoo and might have sushi tonight.

gross

my roomate is an actor. he's been the lead in a NBC sitcom and was most recently on a cable show...

he's gross. TOnight I walked to my room (by his bathroom) and he was sitting on the can with the door half open... like pants around the ankles reading a magazine on the can.

HELLO CLOSE THE FUCKING DOOR

his fiancee does this also, she'll get in the shower and leave the main bathroom door open. I fucking hate these people.

PLEASE PRAY FOR ME

THAT I WILL GET A JOB THIS TV SEASON.

ALL THE SHOWS I MET ON LAST WEEK WEREN'T PICKED UP THIS WEEK!!

BUT I NEED A JOB, I CAN'T SURVIVIE ANOTHER YEAR WITH NO HUMAN CONNECTION AND PLACE TO GO EVERY DAY, I WILL LOSE MY MIND AND MIGHT DO SOMETHING DRASTIC LIKE GOING POSTAL!!

so please right now, even if you're not religious, google St. Jude, the Patron Saint of Impossible things and say his prayer for me!!! I BEG OF THEE! It works, but I need you guys do help me!

also on sat. night i got drunk and tried to convince my friends to make me a burger so I could re-create the Drunken David Hasselhoff video, I wanted to transcribe the video and do the entire thing start to finish! Hilarious.

Now please pray for me!

pissing off my roomate

I know what really pisses off my roomate, the guy who owns my place, losing money. He is the cheapest man i have ever met, EVER. he alwasy talks about money, how much things cost, how much he's made/making etc. it's really the only thing he ever speask about. THe only time he tells me something, it has to do with a story about him and his acct. and money making schemes. so he's annoyed to me so much that I'm going to hit him where it hurts, his wallet.

about 2 weeks ago I started to wash everything i own. I do not pay utilities here so before I move out next month I want everything i own to be clean. EVERYTHING. Last night I did about 6 loads of laundry, maybe 7. 2 weeks ago I did about 10. Every sheet, towel, t-shirt I plan to bring to my new place to be used as a dust rag... all being washed. somethings i will re-wash before I leave, just to jack up the price of his hot water/gas and water bill. I've also started making long distance phone calls from my home phone whihc he also pays for, but when we signed up the phone, he wouldn't pay for long distance... all the more reason to make long distance calls from there at a higher rate... all these bills will come in after i've mooved INSERT EVIL LAUGH HERE!

holy crap. today I went into the kitchen to take a picture of the CAKE CUTTER and it looks like the post-it fairy has struck again. God help my roomates future children... they're fucking insane!!

anyway, tell me this doens't look like a fucking spatula.

okay so i wrote the othe day about my fucking crazy roomates and their emails. here's the full exchange of the cake cutter/spatula debate. i will upload the actual offensive cake cutter i used and you tell me i fyou think it looks like a spatula.

Original Roomate email Today she pointed out that used an (expensive) cake cutter to make eggs with, using it as a spatula. I need you to be more careful with this, please.

my reply Sorry about the cake cutter, it looks like a spatula, I honestly didn't know the difference.

his reply the cake cutter is about 3 inches shorter than a spatula (as it's not made to keep hands safe from burning oil), and more visibly, it has serrated edges used for cutting. It kind of resembles a spatula... but they don't look alike.

um.. it kind of resembles a spatula, but they don't look alike? that doens't make sense. I'm waiting for the roomates to get out of the kitchen to go take a picture of the cake cutter I used that looks EXACTLY like a spatula.

the past few days have been crayz, i have had meetings and fights with my stupid self absorbed roomate who taught me the difference between a cake cutter and a spatula, i checked out an apt in brentwood, but didn't love it and it comes with a roomate and don't want that def. now for sure.

i'm stressed about a job, about a place to live and about finding a boy, it must be may, that's when al this bullshit comes to a head every year.

I told actor roomie about how bad spiderman was and he said that the 3rd of everything it always bad like how he was on the 3rd season of a hit show and it sucked after the first 2 seasons were critically acclaimed. yup, it's all about him!!!

next weeekend is my bday and i'm going to the spa and going to tell any of my friends to join and i'm going to bring yummy cake!! haven't made the plans yet, but in my head this is happening!

i really need a vacation!

i hate my roomates, i hate them.

this is ongooing. but this is the email I got from him today.

Sarah,

Girlfriend (no name for anonimity) has been pointing out to me a lot of crusty dishes and utensils that are getting put back in the shelves. Some of them I know are yours. Today she pointed out that used an (expensive) cake cutter to make eggs with, using it as a spatula. I need you to be more careful with this, please. I want you to inspect the dishes you put back.


HE WANTS ME TO INSPECT THE DISHES? WHAT AM I AN ARMY SARGEANT

i eat at the house like once a fucking week. and who the fuck can tell the difference between a spatula and a cake cutter?

last night I went to remi and carrie's for remi's birthday party... i need more time than i have right now to really write what took place, but I'll give you a tease:

remi and carrie take pole dancing classes. for her b-day, carrie got remi a pole installed in the middle of the apartemtn. suffice it to say, pole dancing ensued, yours truly took a whirl but my jeans were too tight to really pull off sexy moves... photos to follow... oh yes.

i am writing an hour long pilot right now for my portfolio, these usually run around 60 pages tops, I am now on page 44 and I'm only half way through the script.... so i'm putting my script at around 80 pages... that's going to be a major re-write. I hope to be done by next thurs with a first draft. according to my writing scedule I've mapped out.

yesterday I went to the gym and after my very hard workout, i was feeling on a high, proud of myself, yeah for me! I go to the gym every day, but i was feeling particularly good. So i cruise into the locker room where I come upon 3 women who are the perfect specimens of the human body, huge tits, blond, slamming body, and they are talking about working out and abs, etc.

This naturally deflates my good feelings of myself.

i am literally staring at these woman thinking i hafe3 never seen women like this before in crunch, (my gym), seriously, it was very strange and i'm like who are they.

well, upon exiting the locker room later, I realize why they are so perfect. THEY ARE PLAYBOY BUNNIES!! yeah, i guess there is some reality show with the playboy bunny girls and when I left the locker room, they were standing with camera and sound people.

Phew! I still feel bad for my body, but not as bad now that i know they're like professional good looking people.

not usually my thing

i dont usually post stuff going on in the world, just my world, i am just that selfish.
but i saw this and thought it was interesting. Quite interesting in fact: quite interesting being my new favorite show from england that i watch on youtube and i've put a request for tickets for a taping when i go to london after I get hired on a show later this month.

anyway, i digress here's the list of the top 10 most common passwords

1. password
2. 123456
3. qwerty
4. abc123
5. letmein
6. monkey
7. myspace1
8. password1
9. link182
10. (your first name)

my weekends are pretty lame. sad but true. i find myself in my bed watcing DVDs for hours becaus I have nothing to do and no one calls. LAME!

i was picked up at the coffee bean by a nice jewish bloke on sunday morning. his friend told him in hebrew to ask me out, he translated that to me, and then we talked a little, he was very nice, and then his friend told him in hebrew that I should convert. yeah, good luck on that one. of all Catholics you come across, i'm the least likely to convert to any religion!!

but it was nice to be asked... anywho, spent all weekend on my internet dating profile, i went live yesterday, but my photos haven't been approved yet, so i'm still waiting to get some responses11 WOO HOO!

i have 2 meetings this week, i'm hoping more are coming down the pipeline, may begins the staffing season!! I CAN'T BELIEE I MADE IT AN ENTIRE YEAR! I DID IT!!!! i was so fucking freaked at the end of last may thinking i would never make it an entire year without (really) workking, but Thank God I did it! I DID IT! never been prouder of me in my life!!

THE POST IT FAIRY

update on my roomie who leaves post-its every where. I ate one of her chocolates just to spite her. FUCK HER

idol gives back

last night i went to the tapig of american idol gives back. it was 2 hours and i was nervous i was going to get antsy and want to leave, but suprisingly it was a total blast. Took my friend Carrie who i know from high school and who i watch idol with every week. SO MUCH FUN

my friend called me out of the blue with the tickets last minute and they were amazing seats and after we went into the VIP area and I saw one of the cast members of house and of course nearly died and watned to go up to her and tell her how much i love her on the show b/c after House she's the best character but didn't because I've never done that and didn't want to start now.

Anyway, had a blast, a really fun night. I love fun nights.

this morn, i went through and replied to all these eharmony matches, why do i still belong to this site?

oh and my photo shoot pictures I can pic up today!! I forgot the little ticket, but i hope they'll still give them to me!! going live next week on another dating site, it's my relaunch (it was supposed to happen a month ago but whatevs.)

in other news, my female roomate has started to put post-its up all over the place basically telling me things to do and not to do. it's annoying. the other day i wa slike are those post its for me and she's like they're for all of us... which means me.

so another one went up yesterday on a bag of girradelli chooclates in the fridge that said "please don't eat thanks" now she knows I dont eat that kind of stuff, has never seen me eat that kind of stuff and still puts the note on becuase she's so stupid she's probably forgotten the million conversations i've had with her how i dont eat that kind of crap, neverthelss, it's fucking so insulting. I NEED TO MOVE OUT!!

woo hoo, i don't have cancer!! phew! what a huge relief! all those things that were removed from my colon the other day were benign. that's a good phone call to get.

I was going to lie to everyone and tell them I dind't have cancer even if I did so it wouldn't ruin my chances of getting staffed on a tv show, but now I dont have to lie!

tonight i'm going to american idol gives back!! my friend trae hooked me up with the tickets and i'm taking my friend carrie who i watch Idol with every week (she makes me dinner, i'll do anything for a free dinner) anything!

photo shoot

yestefday i got up early and headed to Taboo, a place that does hair and is open on sundays! Got my hair done very gisele bundchen and headed to bernsie's for the photo shoot. photos to come by weeks end.

it was really fun. first we went to a park in bev hills and did some color shots, then back to B'shouse for b&w. 4 wardrobe changes, some with glasses, some without, some with sunglasses. poses, not poses, etc. hilarious. all in all 70 pics taken. cannot wait to see them!!!

sat. night went to buca di beppo on santa monica for my friend kate's going away party, then headed out to lounge 217 on the promenade. I wasn't really drinking. but it was fun anywway. Met a cute boy but of course he was from san fran and wasn't picking up what i was putting down.

i have a bunch of meetings this week (actually today and tomorrow) and then the rest of the week I need to finish my pilot (or the bulk of it anyway) and work out and get some rest, I've been super tired recently.

rainy rainy

it's a rainy day here in LA and i like it. i wanted to lay in bed and feel sorry for myself all day but i decided to come to the writers guild and work on my script for my pilot, the one I'm doing just for fun. It's an hour long script a drama-edy. Me likey.

i'm excited for this weekend cause on sunday my friend bernadette is going to take pics of me to put on my online profile. I'm relaunchingt myself online next week (postponed a week cause bernadtte coudn't take the pics last week) the onloy downside is i thoughth I would've lost more... or any ... weight by doing bootcamp, but i haven't so the pics are going to be with fat sarah. but i am getting my hair professionally done before the pics so that should help. even if i haven't lost weight, I did shit my brains out for my colonoscopy so my skin looks so clear and great, definite bonus to the misery i've expeirenced the past 3 days.

so i'll post the pics here too! we're doing some outside (weather permitting) and inside, some with glasses and without, should be fun!! I can't wait to start getting guys to email me cause i'm a beauty! or at least my picture leads them to believe that'st he case.

i'm re-writing my profile and I have already pre-selected like 30 guys I want to send emails to as soon as I join, wasting no tiime!

looks like i made it

my colonsocpy tookplace this morning, that's the easiest part of the procedure. the day before and all the prep is the nightmare. I couldn't eat all day yesterday so i went from tuesnight at 8pm until thurs at 1pm with no food! so naturally i just chowed down and went to Toast and had a big meal and then amy, nat and I split a red velvet huge piece of cake!

my doctor found 3 polyps in my colon, gross I know oh and my antheiologist didn't know any single guys, yeah I asked right before he put me under...

pinkberry

on a totally separate note, i had pinkberry the yogurt sensation yesterday for the fidrst time and i was not impressed. what is all the fuss about. for those of you not in LA, it's like a cult here, it's a fucking yogurt place, that's it, but people worship and are addicted to it. why? i have no idea, it's kinda yuck.

I NEED A BOYFRIEND!

desperate times call for desperate measures. i have no idea what those measures are, so i'm soliciting sugtestions. that is spelled wrong but i dont care.

any whoodle, i need help on finding a boyfriend, doing the interent thing ain't working, telling everyone i meet, LITERALLY EVERYONE that i'm looking aint' working either. Perhaps a billboard on sunset blvd.

on a more serious topic, when i saw in the land of women the other night, i kinda freaked cause the meg ryan character has cancer and her husbnad is not around cause he's having an affiar so she's going through this thing all alone. tomorrow I have to get a biopsy of a growth in my colon which very well could be cancer and i dont have a boyfriend or significant other so if it is, I would be going through it all alone. Now sure it's highly unlikely that someone my age would hav colon cancer, but then again, it's hikely unlikey someone my age would have a growth thre in the first place. I know I have a ton of friends and family who loves me, blah blah, but for some reason, and i blame this reason on meg ryan's character, i want a boyfriend.

so i have less than 24 hours to find a suitable mate. the pressure is on however, based solely on the numerous A's i would recieve writing term papers the night before they were due, I would say I thrive under pressure. So here's hoping i find that mate. Unfortuanately, I"m not allowed to eat all day today so meeting someone in a restaurant is highly unlikely....

and i work out at the gayest gym in LA, so that's out... oy... time's ticking.

last night i hit the premiere of the new adam brody movie... i've already forgotten the title... In the league of women, something about women, a whole lot of women... I dont' remember, where has my memory gone? anyway, i thougth it was cute, albeit very heavy with just about every movie cliche thrown in the receipe: broken heart, cancer, young love, dead grandma, lost twenty something... sorry if I spoiled it for you. IN THE LAND OF WOMEN, that's the title.

I'd like to say I remembered it, but alas i did not, had to google it. Even though I got 2 tank tops in the gift bags that said embalzoned across them "in the land of women," i couldn't remember it. Oy!

so i went to the movie at the arclight with remi and then carrie joined us at at hte premiere party. i had fun, chowed down on salmon and broccolli and then chocolate covered strawberries, a lot of them and then got on the scale this morning only to regret eating those strawberries (oh and 2 glasses of wine)

also last night, i was uninvited to a party that my ex (from like 100 years ago... okay over a year ago) is going to be at. My friend (who i met through him, but turns out we run int he same TV circle and have since become friends independent of hte intial introduction by him) had to call and tell me that she was in fact having the party, but made the executive decisiuon to uninvite me since he's goign to be there with his girlfriend. I'm like who fucking cares? the thing is you just dont make the decision on your own as the host, that is an assumption, at least I would never make, so she obviously called him and he put the kibosh on it, hellloo, it was like a million years ago, get over it. Seriously, he dumped me, aren't I the one who gets to make those decisions?

anyway, she called and uninvited me like the alannis morrisette song. Lame.

Remi and Carrie take me to a lot of premiere and preiere parties, which i love to go to, but some of the parties have better gift bags than the others so here is my ranking of the parties they've taken me to in terms of free shit I've gotten:

1. blood diamond - edun shirts created by bono's wife taht sell at barneys for $50, no contest
2. league of women - a self help book, nail polish and a tank top - not bad
3. Beer fest - i think i got a beer bottle opener - suck!

so much has happened since I last wrote.. so much!

I left NY on wed. and didn't get to LA utnil thurs. I was first stranded in Kentucky, then cincinati, then las vegas where I landed at midnight, checked into my hotel at 1am, met up with friends who randomly happened to be there at 1:15am, drank and gambled and danced until 4am, went to sleep at 430am and got up at 7am to catch a flight to LA.

Now understand with the time difference, I had been up for over 24 hours! Perhaps that is why I dropped about $300 in 3 hours gambling, because I didn't have all my faculties about.

thurs was a wash, I was so fucking tired. Friday night I jsut went to bed at like 9pm and slept for 12 hours. that's something people with kids never get to do! ahh it's good to be single and alone ALL ALONE, HAVING NOBODY TO LOVE, ALONE AND LONELY AND ALONE!

but it doesn't bother me.

last night at church i saw a guy i went on a date with who only talked about the entertainment industyr. I totally avoided him while I could tell he was trying to postion himself to bump into me. I AM SO FUCKING IMMATURE AND SUCH A COWARD! I left after commununion, sorry dad and ran to my car to avoid him. like i said such a coward!

still in NY. I'm still here in ny, trying to get back to LA. the weather in the middle of the country is making it difficult. Just another reason i hate the people in between NY and LA. It's their fault.

I'll be back posting from now on, just have had a few busy crazy days, too crazy to talk about.

so i'm in NY just landed this a.m., cruised over to my friend BJs house. she now lives across the street from my parents! oh and I drove there! no joke, so LA. No i ran out to dunkin donuts and it was raining so i just drove directly to her house. she has 2 kids, it's crazy

so i'm now checking my eharmony profile messages, etc and i asked this guy how adventurous he is actually i asked waht was the most adventurous thing he's done in the past year and here's his answer.

It's drilled into us that a businessperson should always follow a careful plan, and an academic should always be rational. So, most of my spontaneity had be reserved for artistic or private life. I've done some creative designs for Powerpoint presentations or websites that suddenly involved me following some spontaneous idea to its conclusion. Or similar, writing some work (perhaps fiction) I've simply sat down and written almost non-stop until the idea had turned into a complete work. As far as the most spontaneous thing I've ever done, well, I've spontaneously sent people nice gifts on occasion, and that has to rank way up there in the spontaneity-meter.

Umm, did he just say the most spontaneous thing he's done in the past year was A FUCKING POWER POINT PRESENTATION??!?!!?!? this does not seem like the guy for me.

and people wonder why i dont come home that often. years ago I used to come home much more often and stay for extended periods of time and get totally wasted and have fun blowing tons of money in NYC, well those days have changed. I've realized that all my friends in Ny have their own lives and don't necessarily fit into them, natural progression of life I suppose.

Instead of partying in NY my life has been relegated to being an errand boy for my mother. I just got a list of items I'm needed to pick up when i arrive tomorrow, essentially errands to run. turns out my sister in law is too busy to get stuff for the kids easter basket so she has asked my mom to take care of it and guess who my mom has asked to take care of it... ME! and then she also has a list of stuff I need to pick up at the bakery, etc. HELLO, MY TRIP TO NY ISN'T A VACATION?!?! I still need to write every day.

I used to be able to just chill and get wasted when I came home cause i had a job lined up but that's not the case this time, so i need to write every day TO GET A JOB! my parents must think I'm just on spring break or something?!

VIEWER DISCRETION ADVISED

Yesterday was quite the day, I had a camera shoved up my ass and then coincidently i had another drs. appt yesterday and so at the gyno I had a few fingers shoved up my vajay jay.

do i really need to go into more details? I thought not.

I'm 32 and have had a camera in me on more than 3 occassions due to insane intestinal crisis i have had over the years. Now I need to get another colonscopy to remove and biopsy some growth. Yeah, I'm fucking gross!

On a better note my gyno gave me pills for my thyroid that will hopefully help me lose the weight that is not coming off through diet and excercise. Here's hoping I soon look like nicole richie!!

I have been working out insane! INSANE! went to bootcamp yesterday and the day before and then the day before that I was at crunch where I was rocking the treadmill next to drew barrymore.

but yesterday at boot camp, I was working out with rex lee who plays Ari's assistnat on entourage.

I might not be losing any weight even though I work out more than arnold schwarnegger, but I am geting to see a lot of the hollywood elite!!

celeb count this week: 5

celeb sighting

it's been a while since I've spotted a celeb, well, that's not true, I see Famke Janssen every day when I get my cofffee at my fave coffee shop, but I dont count her.

Last night on the treadmill next to me was ms. drew barrymore! so exciting, right? she was running and I was running and then my shoe had been tied too tight so I stopped and when I looked up, i'm like that's either drew barrymore or someone who's a really skinny look a like, that's right, she's totally skinny. You know how you can tell someone is super skinny by their arms, she had those anorexic actress arms, yes, i was jealous of them cause i want those arms!!!

anyway, i was running faster than her, FYI!! but yeah, she's tiny, but now i know her secret, hitting the treadmill! I'll be looking like her in no time.

how cute are my neice and nephew?

GO IRISH!!

saturday night my friend kristin wanted me to meet this guy who is a producer on dave matthews albums and for a number of other artists and she thinks i'd likey. so i meet up with her at this party around midnight in the hills at the home of some record producer. this house was crazy insane amazing, complete with floor to ceiling windows, a room with an awesome music set up, sweet piano, drums, bass, guitar both acousitc and electirc, really amazing food, etc. the people had just come from a mandy moore concert like a small one at some small cafe, she's trying to change her sound. whatever that means

anyway, remi and i had been at st. nicks with kyle and bernie waiting for the show to be over and the party to begin so we head up to this party and around 1:30 remi and i sit on the couch to rest our feet when all of a sudden the entire band comes over and starts up an impromtu jam session/,mandy moore concert and remi and i are in the front row totally by accident. I was honestly suprised at how great mandy's voice is. really surprised, i know your're reading this saying "say waht, she blows," but now she has this whole allanis morrisette thing going on without the angsty, dark hair in her face look.

anyway, we watched the concet and then someone else got up and sang and as we were leaving, Ben lee who is a famous rock star was about to get up, but the boy i was supposed to talk to was on the Bass the entire time and i didn't get a chance to speak to him, but he was cute, so that's a start. it was a serious rock star party! these people jam until like 5 am!!! i was in bed by then thank god, i'm such a baby!

I met the hottest guy at the coffee bean this morning, married, but cute and english and boxes!! so he told me to go with him to his boxing gym and take a lesson wiht his trainer to see if I like it, SERIOUSLY I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR THIS GUY!!

i think i need to start taking ritalin to help me focus, all i do all day long is play on the internet. I search and search for stories that I can post on the TV blog I write for and then find myself on all sorts of weird celebrity blogs, etc. it's a strange life.

hours go by.

i ran into my friend paul yesterda at the coffee bean he was writing, we used to write together on a show and now he's a movie writer and in my friend circle. Then i headed over to remi and carrie's to watch greys anatomy, which i loved! i thought it was a great patrick dempsey ep, LOVE ME SOME PD!!

i haven't lvoe dhim for a long time, perhaps my love for Hugh laurie usurped that, but now PD is back in the race, what race you say? i have no idea.

got up at 430am AGAIN to go to bootcamp, then came home and slept for another 2.5 hours. I wonder if that just counter acts the metabolism rev up i do for an hour. I'm actually thinking of going every day at 5am!! maybe doing the bootcamp academy that lasts for a month, every day at 5am... hmm, must discuss with keisha.

either way next week i'm going to bootcamp three times cause I can only go one day the following week due to my trip to NY. i'm really enjoying bootcamp, either i'm in much better shape than i was 3 years ago when i used to do it, or barry is going soft.

a little irish joke for the day

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he
had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking
up
to heaven he said, "Lord take pity on me. If you find
me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me
life and give up me Irish Whiskey!"

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Paddy looked up again and said, "Never mind, I found
one."


yesterday i met with my agents, same old story., they need to find me a fucking job. point blank period.

peer pressure

i smoked a cigarette today, my first one since new years eve. I'm so mad at myself, but i was over at my agency and one of the agents wanted to gossip so she grabbed 2 cigs and we went out to smoKE i apparently have no will power. it wasn't even that good either! well, i did last basically 3 months! and I was going to have one june 1st, but now I guess I already had that one today!

did i mention that on sat. night berna and i watched the secret. I now know the secret and i am already applying it to my life, sure the movie is very hokey, but the message is a good one and one that I totally and completely believe. Sure it's hard to get past the image of a woman longingly looking at a fancy necklace in the window and then she's walking on the beach and the necklace appears around her neck, but if you can get past that kind of thing, then you'll really appreciate the power of positive thinking and the law of attraction.

place an order with the universe and watch the movie.

berna was embarrassed to admit to me that she bought the movie and I was like hello, i've been dying to watch it! so instead of going out and navigating the crowded bars on st. pattys day (meanwhile I had gone out to irish pubs both thurs and fri. night) we drank wine and watched the secret instead.

yesterday i had dinner at the schaffers, corned beef and cabbage, a traditional irish meal. I only at the carrots, potatoes and cabbage asi'm trying to be good on my diet!!!

i bought a ticket this weekend to go to ny for a few days for Easter. but only a few days to see my family, so dont get mad if you dont see me while i'm there. you know how my family is around holidays! HIGH MAINTENANCE

vicodin

yesterday i took a vicodin to help with stomach cramps. It was a nice way to spend the day very doctor house for my friends who love the show, i'm looking at you remi and carrie! I won't say how I procured said pills, let's just say i had them left over from a dental procedure...yeah, let's go with that story, I only actually took a half of one, niiiice. then i went through all my reciepts to do my tax organizing.

i did nothing else yesterday except fill my gas tank, eat badly and go to churhc. not the most exicting day.

today I woke up so confused about where i was or what day it was, i'm guessing the vic had something to do with it, right, cause that never happens to me, I woke up exhausted too and i remember having all these strange dreams, hey i'm starting to think taking vicodin might be bad for you!!

irish soda bread

i love irish soda bread. Oh my is it the yummiest thing ever. For those of you who didn't grow up in an insanely irish family surrounded by irish people all the time talking about ireland and then being sent to live in ireland for a year, you might not know the wonders of irish soda bread, run to your local whole foodds and get some today!

i just got an entire loaf, (i went to bootcamp at 5am so it's okay) and have been gnawing on it ever since. I'm not sure even bootcamp can burn this off! got up at 430am having gone to bed at 1230am and then went to bootcamp from 5-6am and then slept from 615am to 8am. then my friends amy and greg had me over for french toast, yum yum, what a treat after bootcamp. i think i might ttreat myself too much after these bootcamp sessions,...

went out to molly malones last night to listen to an irish band play (a bunch of americans pretending to be irish, hhmmpph,) and it was really fun.

stop reading my blog and go get yourself some irish soda bread.

katusya X 3

last night i went back to the new katsuya! Christie was in town again and she was much nicer to me. phew. ok, so my appearance on the village live rocked the hizzy and they've already asked me back. I loved it! I had so much fun and can't wait to go back again. ALso I've lost weight, not sure how much but in the past week around 3 pounds!!!

going to hear the wild hogs guy band tonight at molly malones, we shall see if he is flirty at 930 with me! (that's the time the band goes on)

shout out to amy who sent me flowers for my appearance (and new career as a talking head) i love them!!!!

got a ton of nike stuff from Christie including a pair of shoed to big for me, so i'm giving them to my friend jenny who is totally broke and last week told me she needs new running shoes but can't aford them! funny how life works out sometimes!!

i will give a full report on my talk show appearnace soon!

I just had my b'ffast, my hair is dry, I"m all packed (never actuallly unpacked seeing as I got here 12 hours ago), and I'm ready to head to the studio, my driver should be here within the hour!! I think I"m ready, I just dont want to go off message and lose track of what I want to say, i've done that before when pitching TV shows, and I look like a bluthing idiot. I think this experiecne is going to be really good for me! Unless I fall when I walk out and the footage ends up on the daily show or something horrible.

I just heard that there's dunkin donuts here in orlando!! we dont have them in LA. Maybe I"ll ask my driver to hit one on the way back to the airport. Cannot believe I'm going back to LA this evening already!

ORLANDO BABY

I'm in orlando for my big TV talk show debut tomorow morning. It's going to be hard I just flew in tonight and have to be up at like 8am which is 5 am LA time but with the hour jump ahead my body will think it's 4am, and everyone looks so super sexy at 4am, am I right? I had some dinner in my room, seeing as I know nobdy at this hotel (which is on the unversal studios property) and there are only families here. I leave tomorrow night at 7pm, not sure what I'm going to do between 1pm and 5pm when my car service takes me to the airport, perhaps hit the rides over at universal studios!!!

Preparing right now for what I"mgoing to say. Went shopping on sat. and got 2 great outfits for the producers to choose from, I'm really nervous, but I'm sure I'll do great, Ii'm just nervous I'll cuss or something.

I'm on tomorrow at noon, so watch me!!!

exicting news

hey everyone, I'm going to be on TV!! on monday at noon on NBC, i'll be on a show called Ivillage live talking about TV couples!! I'm flying to orlando sunday morn and i'll be back in LA monday night. sounds like a rough 24 hours, yet super exiciting. Kristin and I are going shopping tomorrow for a new outfit and right now I"m headed to get my eyebrows and mustache waxed! Yeah, i have a lot of facial hair, it's an irish thing, deal!

got up at 430am to go to bootcamp only to find out that keisha, my bootcamp co hort totally bailed! She was a no show, but i rocked the 5am class and was so happy to be done with my workout by 6am!! good days.

post #401

yesterday's post was my 400th!! how exciting!!

i sat in that jury assembly room all freakin day and didn't get put on a jury, which i'm thankful about, but what a waste of time. Out of the 80people there they only called 30 for one trial and picked 12. I was not one of the ones called so basically they brought in 50 people willing to be on a jury and then made them sit there for 8.5 hours. I took a few naps, played on the internet and read an entire book and ate a bag of wheat thins and maybe a few gold fish and some pirates bootie my one friend who I made had.

last night i went to barry's bootcamp with keisha, it's an insane workout, we're going to do 3Xs a week. We go again tomorrow morning AT 5 AM!!! that means I"ll have to get up GET UP at 430am. but keisha said just think about how good you'll look next month, true that. I'll go back to NY for Easter (supposedly, haven't booked a ticket) lookign slim!!! but 430am is pretty damn early for someone who don't got no job!! i told keisha i'm only going 2Xs a week to begin with, I dont want my body to be burned out and then resiliant to working out!! hopefully it will do okay, i dont feel sore at all this morning, so that's a good sign!!

watched Amerian idol too afterwords with Carrie and Chris. Carrie is my friend from high school who lives down the street from me.

jury duty

I'm currently at the LA superior court house serving jury duty. I"m so bored. this is the most inefficiently run office. HOly crap people are dumb and everything has to be said like 12 times and very slowly.

also i've never seen such an ugly collection of people. What i've also learned is that i dont like be around a large group of strangers, not like in a bar in beverly hills, but in a courthouse downtonwn.

this a.m. bernadette came over at 630am to take pictures of me for her final photography project for her phtotgraphy class. she is doing a series of photos of her friends getting up first thing in the morning and running through her morning routine.

fuck i hope I dont get on a jury, this is the most retarded experience. I've beensiting here for 3.5 hours and nothing has happened yet. NOTHING except a woman going through the paperwork we were supposed to fill out when we first receieved the summons. PEOPLE ARE SO FUCKING STUPD! you should hear the questoins they ask, I'm like are you serious?

oh, guess what, we might be getting a break for 15 mins, a break from doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

went out to the new katsuya restaurant last night, FUCK IT WAS SO FUCKING GOOD! with one of my best friends christy who is in town for work, we had a very nice time... can't really elaborate on that, things going down in her life, can't share since it's not my life.

but i ate a ton of sushi and she was very honest about her thoughts on how i dress, my hair, my purse (which i said "people always compliment me on it" to which she responded "they lied.")

like i said brutally honest. anyway, I told her I couldn't dress better because I dont feel good about myself and it was only confirmed when i got my hair cut this a.m. and had to sit in front of a mirror for 45 mins looking at myself, and i never never look in the mirror, it's so bad, but i was forced to and all i could think about was how monstrous I am (and clearly my friends agree if you think about christy's comments So i'm glad i'm doing a makeover because if anyone needs it, it's me!

real job

I dont think I would ever be cut out for a real job. I dont know how you people do it. I do however find myself every day at the writers guild lounge for members where I do my writing.

the lounge is in the same building as the writers guild and the people who work at the offices of the writers guild so often I find myself in the elevator with these people who have real jobs.

I cannot for the life of you tell you how many times I have heard the following conversation in the elevator.

SET THE STAGE: I'm in the elevator, I have hit parking level D, a few people come on and one hits parking level C and another level B. Then another person gets on and hits level A

Parking level C person: Oh, i guess we're taking the local. Making all stops.
everyone: laugh laugh laugh
In my head: SAY WHAT? THAT'S NOT FUCKING FUNNY AND I'VE HEARD THAT SAME CONVO LIKE 7 TIMES!!

I am so committed to my weight watchesr it's scary. My friend Liz was bothering me about eating or drinking something and thi is what I said:

"I am really committed to losing weight, so I wont be eating or drinking tonight, I'll probably have a small meal before I meet you guys out and I would really appreciate your support during this time but if you can't give it to me, I understand, but I won't be able to hang out with you right now.

YEAH, HOW ANNOYING AM I?!?

wild hogs

last night i went to go see wild hogs with like 30 people with my friend who wrote it. It was a really fun time! We all yelled and cheered when his name came up on the screen, very cool. before he had all of us over his house for some awesome food and this guy came up to me and started talking to me, a friend of a friend who i'd met a few times before. Anyway, he marched right up to me and re-introduced himself saying "hey we met at blah blah." and i was all wathever, but then we sat next to each other at the theatre and chatted for a while before the movie started and i found myself flirting with him!

so then after the movie people were going back to my friends house for drinks all night, but I couldn't go cause my ride was heading home. SO i said goodbye to everyone and this morning I wake up to find an email from him!! Inviting me to hear his band play at an irish pub here in town! (we had talked about where his band played) BUT he said it was great to see me TWICE in the email!! and the email wasn't that long!

an update on this eharmony guy who has cancelled 2 dates, then called me on tues to re-schedule for this weekend, i called him back tues. night said this weekend sounds great and now it's sat. afternoon and i haven't heard from. THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT!

Paper V. Plastic

we all know what it's like to go to the grocery store and get asked Paper or plastic? Usually I just say either one is fine. But this year, thanks to oprah, it's my year and included in that I"m going to be more decisive (which will come in handy i assume at jury duty next week) so in keeping with that I have finally decided that It is now and forever shall be plastic. I will be saying "plastic," from now on and i dont care about the environmental repurcussions. It feels good to not let someone make choices for me! So yesterday, you can see was a big day for me at Whole Foods when I came to this decision


had dinner last night with Liz, Rachel, Kate and Keisha at Jones. It was so freaking good and I was soo good by only eating a salad (with no dressing since I hate dressing and always have) Yeah me!! I have recently come across a picture of Britney spears when she was super skinny and it's now imprinted in my head as what I want to achieve (I know she's also fucking crazy and perhaps I should not be tyring to emulate Britney, but nevertheless, I'm going to get her body!)

naturally I have said this before and failed, but this time I'm serious.

eyebrows

I think that last time I plucked my eyebrows (because I was too lazy to go get them waxed) i may have overdone it a little. so now I have to grow them in and get them professionaly waxed and shaped which sounds easy enough, right? Hardly.

I look like a monkey. I just plucked my left one too much and it starts way off to the left and so while I 'm waiting for the hair to grow back... they look terrible and all messy!!! UGH!

drinks in the valley

yesterday I spent the day at the writers guild. It was below my expectations on the amount of writing i got done, but this seems to be a pattern I'm getting into. Had drinks last night at this pub in the valley called Maeves residuals. I wasn't sure what to expet, it sounded like a shit hole, but was pleasantly surprised when I got there to see it's actually pretty nice. Met up with my friend alexis and we got drinks bought for us by men, which is so strange cause that never happens in hollywood, but in the valley, they think i'm cute!! must rememeber this.

my friend wrote the movie Wild Hogs that comes out tomorrow night, so i'm going to the movie with him and a huge group of people to see how the audience likes it. He has this insanely awesome house in the hills so he and his wife are going to have dinner for everyone there first!! so excited!! i love when my friends have a lot of success and let me get to be a part of it!!!!