I'm sick! I hate being sick. does anyone know the average lenght of a cold? I'm guessing 7 days, is that right? I guess i could google it. Anyway, I need to be writing stuff today for a deadline and instead my mind cannot seem to focus as it instead is coming up with crazy ideas. For example, my friend scott who writes at the writers guild with me told me today that he broke his arm and has a piece of bone floating around his arm right now. I said he should get surgery to get it out because what if he's eating chicken parmigiana at Dan Tana's and the bone chip floats to his brain and kills him. Then I said but if you finish the food and drink a great bottle of wine and then the bone kills him did he think Dan Tana's was going to charge him because how would they get the money if he's being dragged out the door by the coroner. It would be a tad innapropriate, no? So that's an example of what I'm thinking about instead of finishing my fandango rewrite! yes I already got an offer to write for fandango, sure' it's only 200 bucks, but i'll take it. I might be getting paid more for my show too,just not sure yet. i had a 20 week guarantee so they might have to pay me a few more weeks so that would be awesome!!! but my agent is trying find that out as we speak.

anyway, last night i fell asleep around 7ish too tired to do anything. I woke back up to watch House and then went back to bed. Like I said being sick sucks!

I just went and bought a chocolate chip cookie at whole foods and I told the guy I had put a cookie in the bag and he charged me for a roll which is less money and my head is slow right now that I didn't think to say anything until I had gotten back to the writers guild. Does that make me a bad person? should I go back and tell him? I will really do anything not to do work today.

so my show was cancelled, which blows. But I had wanted to set up one of the writers on my show with my friend Adam. He's so cute and so nice and this chic is super hot, so I thought perfect. However I suspected that she dated high profile men, mostly because she told me a story about how she went on a date with Damon Wayans. Nevertheless, i thought my friend is so great, that how could she not like him!

so i was going to introduce them on halloween. My friend has a huge huge huge party every year and its packed with entertainment industry, mostly TV folk and its a blast. This year sarah silverman was there, mindy kaling from the office, Jon Hamm who plays don draper on mad men, etc etc. Oh and I was there, so there you go, big showbizy party i attend every year.

But adam got food poisoning and coudn't make it, so i told my colleague that I would set them up again in the future... so imagine my surprise when I logged on to justjared.com to find pictures of her MAKING OUT WITH GERARD BUTLER ON A DATE LAST NIGHT AT THE SANTA MONICA PIER!!!!!

I saw this post and was like, whoa, that looks like my friend (i'm not saying her name obviously) and then i texted her and was like "um did you go on a date with 300's Gerard Butler last night?!?!" and she said yes and wondered how I knew, I said check out justjared and TMZ has a video of you making out!!!! GOTTA LOVE THIS TOWN

i think it's over for Adam and her now, i mean he DOES NOT have abs like Gerard! oh well, do i get points for trying?!?!

HERE'S THE VIDEO

http://www.tmz.com/2008/11/11/gerard-butler-sucks-some-serious-face/

well this day has come and i'm not happy about it. after 2.5 years of not having a job to go to (despite writing alone and selling a few things) I finally got one starring alyssa milano, a show that had a great cast and a promising future. it was really well done and was suppossed to be on ABC. Well yesterday it was cancelled and we never filmed an episode. we were just days away from starting production, we had 6 episodes ready to shoot already paid for by the network and the studio... and then yesterday they pulled the plug and I'm back where I started.

what's worse is that the group of writers were so fucking rad. I had the best time, just laughed and laughed. It was such a great cool group, no diva attitudes, no crazy people, just cool optimisitic people. I'm really disappointed! Back to the drawing board.

our halloween party

here is sabrina from our office halloween party, one of the writers kids and coincidently the daughter of my closest friends! She's dressed as wonderwoman! the kids are going trick or treating to all our offices! I"m giving out m&ms.


also heres a pic of my neice rowan at her 6th bday rockstar party! notice that one girl has her hand on her ass!!!! hello early sexualization! Rowan is in the middle in the front, kinda looks like me at that age.

I'm so embarrassed I've taken this long to get back to everyone. You know me I go in phases, i'll do a flurry of posts and then stop for a bit. anyway, i have been crazy busy working on this new show for ABC. its' so much fun, the writers are so great, I love them, no divas or total assholes like on some shows in the past! it's just a good group of writers wanting to do a great project. Unfortunately the network is trying to sabotage us, with notes and throwing out the pilot, they is super crazy! I'm also writing my SONY pilot, well right now, i'm still working on the outline, so i went from having zero jobs to having two. howevr, i haven't gotten paid yet for either, but its crazy for me to assume that I should get paid for workking for SONY for only 2 years and my job for 6 weeks. crazy, to think i should get a paycheck by now...

last night i went to get my vagina waxed, holy fucking shit, it hurt like mad! I haven't had it done for a few years, i'm embarrassed to admit, i mean dont get me wrong, i take care of myself down there, but I save waxing for when it gets desperate! i also got my eyebrows done and my lip!

is anyone else watching gossip girls? i lvoe that show, i love dan humphrey, I'm a little freaked that I'm really a 14 year old girl.

I've seen a few celebs recently, some girls from the hills, and who else... cant remember right now but will soon!

why i heart dave annabelle

last week at the village idiot my friends and I saw dave anabelle (pictured above on the far right!) from brothers and sisters and he was with the guy, i think his name is matthew ryhs also from that show, anyway, I have seen the both of them out before one at the grove (dave) and matthew at the little door next door. Undeniably they are both RIDICULOUSLY good looking, but when next to each other, i found that dave is OVER THE TOP HOSTILE-LY good looking, like crazy amounts of hot! am i right, amy? i know you're reading this and you were with me. anyway, they were all dressed up coming from an pre emmy party and we literally watched them do a lap around the bar after getting a drink, then downing the drink after not seeing any hot girls to hit on (they obviously didn't look over to our table) and then leave. THEY TOTALLY TOOK A LAP LIKE GIRLS DO WHEN THEY'RE SCOPING FOR HOT GUYS!!

and we totally busted them!

anyway, i no longer think matthew is cute because next to Dave he's not, is this a ridiculous discussion to be having with myself? it might be anyway, i'm sure if i see matthew out on 3rd street again, i'll change my mind, but point being, he should really not go out with dave again, because it makes him almost look homely.

weekend

anyone have fun weekend plans? all my friends are off to this amazing orgy up in big bear, like 100 of my friends and I'm in LA. my friend michael rented a girl scout camp and everyone is separated into teams and theres going to be color war and people drinking and doing drugs and your team gets points for every member who goes skinny dipping.... yeah, it's a baccanal orgy type event, i swear. anyway, i can't make it this weekend! boo!

i'm still at work right now writing on another project I have in the works, on top of my current job, so i went from no job to 2 jobs! zoinks! I'm also excited to clean my apartment this weekend, is that a weird thing to look forward to doing?! i think it might be, but i am excited, also I need to hire someone to clean it for the future so maybe its like i'm doing that thing where you eat a ton of food right before you go on a diet cause you know its going to be the last big hurrah! yes i'm weird.

AOC

Last night amy, stevie nix (not her actual name), and Jan and I went to dinner at AOC. I love that restaurant. Hadn't been back since my ex boyfriend and I broke up 2.5 years ago mostly becaues I coudln't afford it but also because that was like our place because it was within walking distance from his house. Anyway, it has great great cheeses and wine. really amazing. it's like a small plate share tapas place and it's fantastic. We had great veggies dishes all really unique, the other girls had some meat dishes, not sure what they were.

Also I have never gone to AOC and not seen at least one celeb, last time I was there, the entire cast of ER was seated at a huge table behind me! Last night was no different, Amanda Siegfried (sp?) was there, she is in Mama Mia and Big Love and is just adorable. Anyway, its fitting that I see her since every day when I drive onto the universal studios, her picture on the mama mia poster stares back at me and then the studio tour tram drives by me playing the Mama Mia theme song, every day, every freakin day!

my vision board

a few months ago i made a vision board. on it a put a hot guy, dream job, cool new phone etc, everything i wanted, oh and of course a house in nantucket. Now I'm totally making things come true. Last night I saw it and on it was a cool new phone, well, guess who bought a cool new iphone hours before!!!! Also, on Monday I started at my new job as a writer on a new ABC comedy, so i can check that off the vision board, now all i need is my house in nantucket!

on saturday night, i was in NYC and went to the premiere of saturday night live, my friend Will is a cast member there. I took my friend who has never been around the entertainment industry or in a room full of celebs like the after party is after the show. I mean like chevy chase, michael phelps. bob costas, penn badley from gossip girls and that girl he's dating who is also on the show. My friend nearly died, he had never been around people like this before. he was quite surprised at how blase I was with the whole thing, but I'm like, i go to the coffee bean in the morning and see eric dane (mcsetamy from greys anatomy) so yeah, not too big of a deal, but we had fun anyway! such a great party, stayed up all night and then caught a plane back to LA to start my new job which i love, my office is freakin huge!!!!! we're at the universal studios! yea, life is good!

I'm in NY for a few days. My mother is retiring next week and so I thought I'd come out and take her out to dinner, i mean retiring is a big fucking deal. Also i'm about to get a job offer on my friend's show and needed to get away before we started work.

I'm going to SNL on saturday night, my friend is a cast member on the show. I have to sit in his dressing room instead of in the audience, but that's ok, then i get to go to the after party and the after after party! woo hoo. I leave on sunday morning for the left coast.

It's raining too much in NY and i do not have the appropraite footwear, my father scoffed at me for wearing flip flops in the torrential downpours, i pretended it didn't bother me, but i'm not going to lie, it's gross to have to step in dirty water in basically bare feet with rubber attached at the bottom. I'm excited for my new show, when the offer is real, I will tell you all about it!!!

my boobs were bumped

yes, my bra makeover was bumped until september, or early oct. Oh well, I'll just have to suffer thorugh wearing the wrong size bra for a couple more weeks. whoa is me.'

I spent this weekend with my cousin, she's 16 and awesome. She's kinda having a rough go of it these days and it doesn't help matters that her 2 older sisters are perfect and her parents hold her to the same standard, which one should never do. so i took her around and we hung out and went to the farmers market, and universal studios (the actual studios, not the theme park) and we walked around the warner bros lot and robertson where we saw the hills being filmed and we were in the restaurant next to Heidi montag who looks crazy fake in person BTW.

Also pauly shore pulled over his range rover and wanted to talk to my cousin, oh did I mention she's all sorts of crazy hot. People were taking her pic everywhere we went, it was freakin insane! Anyway, I was like (to pauly) SHE'S 16!

Anyway, it was fun hanging with my cousin, she's cool. I also went to my friend Paul's hosue on sat. night as he wrote some hallmark movie and it was premiering so me, bernsie, doron went to watch it. it was so delciously bad, we made fun it of the entire time, it was hilarous. It starred mark consuelos (Mr. Kellly Ripa) try and catch it the next time it's on, which I think is friday.

Sunday, i went to yoga with Bernsie, it was an awesome class, i'm still crazy sore. Bernsie left for South AFrica after our class, I have no idea what I'm going to do without her around, I also think Amy is going out of town this weekend to palm springs, she invited me to go with, but I dont feel like it, it's too freakin hot to go out there right now. So no one is in town this coming week... damn!

I'm waiting to hear if I have a job on kristin's show, it was picked up by ABC and now i'm just waiting to see if I am approved by the network. I'll let you know!

is it poosible for someone to get the flu in august? I think i might have it/be getting it! sweet more money out the door to medical problems, i was just thinking how annoying it was not to have my bank send out money to various doctors and hospitals in 2010 (which is currently when my online banking bills stops paying doctors, yeah, i'm slowly paying them off.)

tues night i went to see dave matthews at the staples center. I had VIP passes and we were in the lexus club and got a ghetto spread of food and free drinks. I had been told that part of the auction package my friend won that it also included a meet and greet, which of course is a dream, a freakin dream, no you did not take a time machine back to 1995, i still love DMB okay, sue me!)but then one of the band members died and suffice it to say i did not meet them.

but we had great seats, floor, center section, like row 20, and a lot of people were friends with the band so they sat the whole time so we had a clear shot into daves eyes, where I would love to buy real estate. yes, i am 12 year old girl.

last night a group of us who wrote on Kristin's pilot were taken out to dinner by her at some awesome argentian restaurant. my friends went there last month and saw al pacino. anyway, i sat next to two of the writers from 70s and they pitched me a project that they want me to act in. it's an internet show and they want me to be rob's girlfriend. and then we started pitching ideas for it and my character and we were pretending to be in character, it was fucking hilar (dont worry we weren't obnoxious actors or something, i dont even know how to act, so this should be interesting)

anyway, i think K's show is getting picked up by ABC this week so then i have a freakin job!

Last year I sold a pilot to MTV starring this person pictured above. It was going to be an animated show. So I wrote the pilot and then handed it in and the strike happened and I guess they didn't like my script and decided to not move forward with the project. This happens all the time, i'd say 99% of my friends who have pilots dont actuallyl get the show on the air.

Well, I just found out that with the success of iron man and other super hero movies and the fact that this person recently did a politcal add on the internet that has been getting a lot of coverage, even by my lover Anderson Cooper who usually mocks her, that they're resurecting the show and idea.

now, look, i did the job for cash, I wasn't particularly inspired by this project, I thought hey if it went that would be cool, if not, I just sold my first pilot and believe you me, I have some great stories to tell as a result of dealing with this person and her "people." everyone knew I was doing this project and so now that it's been resurected without me attached, I'm totally embarrassed that people are going to be like "hey your show is on the air, and I'm gonna be like "not so fast, not my show!"

This business is so brutal. Anyway, the person who is the new writer's claim to fame is that she wrote the unauthorized story of three's comany movie!! yeah, so that feels good!

Thankfuly today I'm pitching a show to dreamworks so I've moved on but it's embarrassing to find out a project you had worked on that was dead has now come back to life like the Prodigal Son.

so annoying

sorry, blogger was not being a very good friend to me and not letting me sign in.

anyway, today i got a call to be on a tv show in LA. A local morning show where they're having a bra makeover, like i guess all these woman are wearing the wrong bra size and it's a national epidemic, so they want women to realize and get sized right and start wearing the right size and then they'll look better in their clothes.

so i will NOT be in my bra on TV but they'll show how my clothes look different in the right bra and i think i might be able to keep the clothes and the bra, we'llsee. strangely, i wanted to go to the Wizard of Bras here in LA to get resized as I've lost like 12 pounds and all my clothes are falling off me but mostly my bras are ridiculous. strangely, my friend jenny said to me 3 weeks ago, your bra is retarded, it's way to big for you! OKAY FINE I'LL DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!

i guess the universe SERIOUSLY thinks I'm wearing the wrong bra size as it sent this opportunity my way and I HAD to take them up on it!!

I will let you know how it goes. maybe even post the you tube video. ha!

update on the sweat lodge: I feel much lighter so to speak, thinks havent' bothered me NEARLY as much as they used to, like petty things, like a $55 parking ticket i got yesterday morning, i was like "whatever it happens." pre-sweat lodge i would've been "oh why is the universe out to get me, whoa is me WHOA IS ME!" ok, maybe not that dramatic.... okay maybe A LITTLE DRAMATIC.

You can take the girl out of boulder...

but you can't take the boulder out of the girl.

I was born and raised in NY. I lived there until 18 and around age 16 I knew I didn't like the people or anything about the east coast and pretty much told my parents I was going to college out west. They put a 1000 mile radius around their house and of course I ignored it and went to boulder.

I reazlied this week that I have not lived on the east coast in my adult life. I have lived out west since I was 18 and I'm such a west coast person or a western US person. I mean I've been drinking soy milk since I was 18, and going to Afalfas and Wild Oats before anyone had ever heard of Whole Foods or Trader Joes and certainly before it became a thing. I was eating Quinoa before I could legally drink (not that that stopped me of course) It was just the way of life inboulder, that's what everyone did, eat crazy well, work out all the time and enjoyed being chill.

I like the western way of life, wide open spaces, the sun, the relaxed attitude of all it's residents.

I have a point...
Last night I went to this thing called a sweat lodge. It's a native American tradition where you sit in a teeppe type structure that is covered in tarps and hot stones are brought it in and you sit there and chant and pray to the Great Spirit and think about how enlightened you are... and you sweat and sweat and sweat and sweat... i mean I have NEVER IN MY LIFE sweat so much. I drank 3 liters of water throughout the 2.5 hour thing and i peed once last night whenI got home! I mean, sweat just dripping down you and you're in a bikini or at least I was so you can feel every drop streaming down your body. this picture i ripped from the internet, but will give you a sense of what the structure looked like...


there are 4 rounds, and in between rounds they open the flap for like 5 minutes. The first round you,.. oh and it's completely dark in there, there is not an ounce of light and you're sitting on the dirt well, they have blankets and it's tight quarters... anyway, round one every individually says what they're grateful for in their life and thanks the great spirit for everything and people talked about thier life and how they came to the sweat lodge and the people who were there with them, etc... I dragged bernsie with me since she went to college with me in boulder and is also a yogi and i thought, if anyone of my friends would do this, it would be her....

then during round 2 you say prayers for people, so like I said out loud that I wanted to pray for my mom who is retiring in sept and for my sister and my friends who are moms of young children, etc etc. And it was getting crazy hot in there, and some people would be like "great Spririt, it's john michael again." so this guy would say his prayer and then like 5 mins later speak up again and say another one for like his agent or some shit (very LA) meanwhile the rest of us were DYING!!! I mean words cannot explain how hot this was, it's called sweat lodge for heavens sake!!

Then the 3rd round was intense. everyone speaks at once and you shout out all the things you want to give away, like anger or bitterness, or depression or selfishness, etc and everyone shouts at the same time and screams and it's pretty awesome and cathartic really, very freeing and you feel a lot lighter! Not just from the 10 pounds of sweat you just lost, but from the act of giving away everything that is holding you back from your potential and all the negative energy weighing you down.

Then they open the flap again and then close it and we have the 4th round and that's when you give away all the good things about yourself and this time we went individually again and guess who kept giving away all the good stuff about himself over and over... you got it, john michael. Bernsie and I were dying laughing on the way home cause that guy just wouldn't shut up. even at the post sweat lodge wrap up he talked twice, i chose not to talk at all,

I'm sure making fun of him defeats the purpose of the entire experience but I woudln't be me if I didn't.

anyway, so what's the point of the sweat lodge? well, a little history here compliments of wikipedia... A general version is that the Creator gave the lodge to the people as a way to directly pray or talk with the Creator. The lodge is often seen as a womb, that gives birth and life, and it provides important teachings to the people. Entering the lodge is a sacred happening that involves important rituals and memories. The lodge provides a cleansing of the body, spirit, heart, and mind. Utmost respect is given to the Creator, the lodge, the fire, the medicines, the animals, the four directions, the elders, the participants, and the ceremonies. Thanks are given for the fire's warmth, the importance of the grandfather rocks, the animals for their skins, and the plants for their medicines. Thanks are given for all the necessary elements of nature that provide us with life and survival.

The lodge is a natural way to bring fire, earth, rocks, water, air, human life, animals, and plants together into one, or close association and contact.

So then at the end we all came out of the lodge and took our towels and laid on them on the deck of this house and cooled off. Also i was staring at all the stars which we dont really have down in LA, i mean you can't see them, but in pasadena you can! that was rad.

then at the post sweat wrap up, they talked about how the guy outside the lodge who heated the rocks saw spirits of coyotes and wolves visiting us! (i swear we were not on drugs, i dont even do drugs...) And then this morning bersie told me she had a dream last night where there was wolf in her dream but my face photoshopped on the wolf! WEIRD.

Okay so i have to say it was a very unique experience, and to get around full circle, I have 2 friends out here, one who I went to high school with and her sister in law, both of whom have only lived out here a few years and they want to go to the sweat lodge with me next time I go, so i was like sure... but during the sweat lodge i was thinking, these girls could not handle it, they're too, new york, and I think all the "i'm so enlightened" stuff would freak them out. Bernsie was Like "it all kinda freaked me out and I'm from colorado!" So what I'm getting at is had I never left NY I would never have experienced so much stuff in my life that has shaped me as a person, yes, some of it has been strange and unpleasant, but the sweat lodge, which I'm not sure I'll ever do again, is an example of the the hippie boulder/california things I love to do and i love about being a westerner.

Bernsie said it best "when I was in there I was thinking this is so california, this is the most california thing I have ever done!"

Ive started this trend recentlly where on friday nights I make no plans and then call someone up randomly and then stumble around town and have a great time. 2 weeks ago was when I met up with friends I dont see that often but who live in my neighborhood at happy hour, that unfortunately proved to be disastorous on saturday and quite frankly until monday, no joke.

Last night I called my friend jessica and we walked over to the Stone Rose bar at that hotel on beverly and la cienega. Used to be called the hotel sofitel, but now i Have no idea what its called. Anyway, we got a drink, just caught up, she's a tv drama director and is about to start filming an episode of a hit fox show. Then she was going to a BBQ in los feliz and i wasn't feeling very los feliz-y so my friend Kristin called me and said her and berna were at the bev hills penisula hotel bar and i should come and meet them for a drink. so jessica dropped me off. I was going to walk, but hey, free ride. So we hung out, caught up and then berna dropped me home later that night. It was such a great fun wine drinking night!! I haven't seen kristin in forevs, she's pretty convinced her pilot is going to get picked up to series for ABC so thats awesome cause I have a job writing on that if it does, she'll know in a few weeks, i think by aug. 15th. Do not worry i am not getting my hopes up, mostly because I have lost all hope, whatever, it happens.

This afternoon i'm going to see Mama mia. The movie. My friend karen is having a bday party at the movies like we're 12 or something and so this is the one she wants to see. I'll go since I love colin firth (mark darcy!) and of course james bond, who BTW should not be in a movie that involves him singing and dancing, he's james bond for heavens sake! You dont see sean connery doing that. I have the major hots for james bond, always have! in the book Casino Royale (james bond movies are all based on novels) anyway, one chapter opens up with the sentence, "and james bond lit his 80th cigarette of the day..." Yeah, that's sexy! I mean, sure when he has emphesema and is all gross and wrinking because of smoking damage, no that's not sexy, but that's not how i see james bond now.

Anyway, off to the gym! gotta get in my workout before movie and dinner.

gael garcia bernal

earlier this week, I was driving up robertson and right before I hit melrose I saw Gael Garcia Bernal standing outside some store. It could not have been later than 9:30am. Oh how I wanted to pull over and kidnap him, HE'S RIDICULOUSLY GORGEOUS!!!!





I HAD TO PUT 2 PICTURES UP BECAUSE HE'S JUST SO FUN TO LOOK AT!!!!

Speaking of fun to look at, I saw someone the other day that is not fun to look at, namely tori spelling and her husband dean. They were eating dinner last weekend at Katsuya sushi where I was with Christie, my best friend from college who was down here on bizness. We're obsessed with that place and eat there every time she's in town.

anyway tori and dean were there with some other peeps. No papparazzi there, but the next night the paps were all outside of the Ivy b/c of nicollette sheridan, i'm like is she even a relevant celeb.... enough to have about 10 paps across the street?? I would vote no, but apparently these paps know something I dont.

inspiration can come at the most bizarre times

last night i drove down to the OC to see my cousin who is a senior in college down there and her dad who was in town from seattle to help out at some church thing. Oh, FYI they're fundamentalist Christians, but I try not to hold that against them. anyway, we had dinner with my cousin and her dad (who is married to my first cousin MO) and then we went out for Fro yo at this most awesome place down in huntington beach called America's cup. make a special trip there, it does not disappoint. Afterwards we went back to Hillary's boyfriend's place and her dad fell asleep on the couch and then i offered to give him a ride back to his RV (oh yes an RV he drove down from seattle to do some church work) which was parked at the church. I swear I dont come from trailer trash, i swear! It was actually a pretty suite ride.

Anyway, he and i ended up hanging out in his RV until like 1230am just talking about life. He's almost 50, has 3 kids (2 in college). He has known me since I was 12 and I just think the world of him, so anyway, we just talked and I told him what's been going on in my life and how SONY is trying to break my spirit (jokes on you sony, my spirit was broken long ago by MTV) about how Sony decided 4 days before going to network with my pitch i just spent 3 months writing that we weren't going out with the pitch after all and they wanted me to do an entirely new idea.... and have it ready to pitch in a few weeks... yeah, it's so great being abused by a major studio and having no recourse since I'm a younger writer. Oh and the head of the studio called me up and was like "this is how development works," like this is my first time at the rodeo or something?!?! it was so patronizing. I'VE BEEN DEVELOPING FOR 3 YEARS, HAVE PITCHED TO EVERY MAJOR NETWORK TWICE AND SOLD A SHOW TO MTV LAST YEAR!!!!!


i hate when people talk down to me. Hello, i know what development is like! I could give more great gossip about this story but can't on the interwebs.

but back to the story. anyway, my cousin's husband gave me great advice, and I talked to him about what he is going through and it was a really cool moment in our relationship. I mean he has literally seen me grow up! Families are so interesting. What's cool about him and his fmaily is they're really open and honest about what they're going through, I'm not sure how many other people they share this with, so i consider it a great honor.


yesterday morning, i had to get some follow up dental work. My dentist told me he wasn't going to use anestheisia, and for some insane reason I agreeed. NEVER AGAIN. I was in so much pain, my heart was racing, it was a nightmare. Sure it was over in like 20 mins, but IT WAS HELL!!

last friday night i went out for happy hour with Kate and a few others. Happy hour lasted many happy hours and then ended up causing many unhappy hours the following day. I don't drink much anymore, so i drank way more than I should've. also I hadn't eaten all day so it was the perfect storm of drunken disaster. I think I even smoked pot which is strange seeing as I never do that and at the beginning of the night kept saying no thanks but by the end of the night i turned into bob fucking marley!!! WTF?

so the rest of the weeeknd and even parts of monday were totally useless. Got my ass to the gym yesterday to help myself recover and then hit the movies last night. saw wall-e. thought it was good, but not as great as apparently everyone else did. Tonight I'm going to see the new batman movie, my friend is having a special screening over at warner bros, so i got a few peeps together to check it out. other than that, nothing new to report. Oh i pitched at Warner bros last week but got DENIED!! they apparently didn't like any of our ideas (they brought in 3 different writers to pitch on this idea)

whatever, moving on.

sorry about the disappearance.

the stuff on the professional front that I thought was happening isn't now... oh well, i'm so used to be rejected and disappointed. this industry is so fucking brutal, i would not recommend it for the faint at heart. Anyway, my friend who is the head writer on a show called me and said he's considering a few people for a job that just opened up on his writing staff, and i was one of the peeps, and that was 2 weeks ago and he never returned my calls after that. It's like dating, sometimes people just disappear. he's done this before though, he offered me a freelance script on his show and then instead gave it to mallory from family ties and i had to read her quote in the post that said "it's crazy that i did this cause i've never written a script before!"

today i had to go to the dentist to fix a cracked tooth and replace a leaky filling, total fucking nightmare. I still can't feel my left half of my face. anyway, my dentist employees a full time massuese who massages your feet while you're getting your head drilled.... gotta love beverly hills!

last night i was bored, and since every night is friday night for me since I aint gots no job, I called my friend danny who lives up the street from me. He and his wife invited me over for dinner and a few beers. AFterwards they headed out to see a movie and my friend K called me and so I met up with her at the grove and had a few more drinks and she ate dinner. Then she drove my car to her house and we watched reality bites and then I had sobered up, drove to canters deli bought cookies and ate them on the drive home.

I love that danny lives in my neighborhood. I seriously have such a fantastic area. My friend D. is moving here today and then my friend jessica lives 2 blocks from me and danny and his wife live at the top of my street. Bernsie lives 1.5 miles from me, so sometimes i'll walk over there and yeah, this neighborhood rocks. I've lived here for 1 year and I simply could not be more delighted with this part of town, I also am totally obsessed with my kick ass apartment! i can't believe I didn't live alone before last year! It's just bloody fantastic!

sorry, i cannot believe it's been 9 days since i posted last. I've been crazy busy readying my pitch for SONY Television on monday morning. I had to re-write then re-tool it in order to get it in to shape.

funny hollywood story typical of the tv world. I sent my producer the pitch last friday at 630pm. by monday i hadn't heard back from her with notes and was suprised so i emailed her to find out if she got the pitch. she replied back no she didn't, then 5 mins later followed up with "wait, i did get it. next time to avoid situations like these please dont send stuff to my home on friday night when i'm out to dinner and I forget I recieved it."

soooo i guess her forgetting she recieved something from me is MY fault. I love that she speaks to me like I"m her subordinate, when in actuality, I'm the talent so really she should be mine.

so freakin typical. also, since when (in this town) is 630pm FRIDAY NIGHT??? 10PM yes, but 630pm here at least is still considered part of the business day considering no one starts work before 10am!!!

pffft.


p.s. am i the only one who thinks josh groban is cute sometimes, but other times not so much?

p.p.s. i have things cooking on all fronts of my personal and professinal life, will update when I have more details so i dont jinx myself.

I"m starting to see why actors and in general people in hollywood become drug addicts. it's all because boredom can drive a person crazy. right now i'm not bored, but for the past 2 years combined I have been insanely bored. sure i have projects here and there I get hired for, but since I have to turn them in on my own time, and they usually dont require me to work 100 hours a week i find myself bored.

now back to my thesis statement, i just took an anti-axiety pill because I am bored. I was like I'm going to take a pill and i have a million of htese things since i am and always have been very anxious, so i just popped a pill not because I'm anxious right now, but only because i was in the bathroom and had nothing better to do.

anyway, do not become alarmed, I'm guessing one pill in 2 years because i'm bored is a pretty good ratio and safe. The only ever time I take one is when I'm pitching to a network, although I'm so used to pitching now, I barely even do that. Its strange that something that struck fear in me 2 years ago, doesn't even really show up on my radar now. I'm starting to think i'm starting to mellow, but I suppose it depends on who you ask...

howdy. i'm gonna write more later, just wanted to let you know i was still alive. If I had more to report i would've sadly, but I do not. I've been hanging out and writing and on tuesday I refused to drive in order to be more green and save money (it's 5 bucks a gallon near me) so I walked to the beverly hills library and worked there.

The homeless people of BH spend the day on the internet at the BH library. I'm really curious to know what on earth they are looking up or searching for. They get a little jumpy when people are get too close so it's not like I can look over their shoulder to see them on their gmail account or reading about getting an online degree. I have no idea. then again, why do i assume homeless people dont want to be caught up on current events or have friends they email. I mean if i lost my house and lived under a bench on santa monica blvd in BH, i'd still have people i'd like to think would want to hear from me on email, right?

on sunday I was in church (yes I"m still a good.... good-ish) Catholic girl, anyway, i saw vanessa williams and this is the 2nd time i've seen her recently, the first time being right before easter and i thought she's one of those catholics that come to church only around the big holidays, but i was wrong, she was there (and so freaking skinny, my arms are bigger than her legs) on sunday, so good for her.

Oh and I have a great story about YO and an email exchange we had. I dont even know where to start, but actualy i'm not sure i'm going to share cause I shared with my friend carrie and chris last night and they thought i was a total bitch! which is funny because all my married friends thing I was in the wrong and my single friends think I am in the right... weird. will get to that some other time. need to go work.

dominicks is domi-awesome

last night i just got back from the gym.... wait lets start over...

yesterday morning i got up super early to hike with a friend of mine who i worked with on a show many moons ago. We lost touch and then she hired my former writing partner on her show and from that day forth i decided never to speak to her again. But as you get older and realize life is a nightmare for every fucking person, you soften and we ran into each other at a couple of strike events and picked up where we left off and now we're hiking buddies. Yeah, look who is being the bigger person for the thousandth time in a row... Anyway she is writing on some new show so she is working now so we hike super early. So later in the day, b/c i have so much on my mind these days, i had forgotten that I already worked out and went to the gym last night!?! in the middle of my run i realize... i already worked out today?! who does this? anyway, i figured, well i'm already here so i might as well finish my workout.

so after the gym i get a text from my friend jessica to see if i wanted to get a drink so we head over to dominicks, i freakin love this place. I discovered it like 2 years ago and now live within walking distance and am obsessed! we sat outside by the fire, had a great chat, a nice glass of wine and then headed home. What a fun way to spend 2 hours of your tues night. God, i love LA. (the city not the industry)

so i'm pitching to my producer on friday morning now, it got pushed! I have been writing the pitch and i kinda super like it! Much better than the idea they forced me to pitch last year where wasn't as organic as this one as this one is based on my life in my small town i grew up in. If this show ever made it to air, i'd have to change EVERYONEs names. Because everyone is either based on someone I grew up with or most are an amalgamation of a few people and everyone has names of people from said podunk town. so i hope she likey and wont make me make many changes for when we go to SONY on the 30th.

a couple of years ago when I was rich and never cooked for myself, or did anything for myself if we're being honest, i would go to whole foods in bev. hills all the time an dpick up food. One time while in front of the glass counter trying to figure out what to eat, a man from behind me started giving me suggestions, completely unsolicited. he told me to get the chicken nuggets. I turn around to thank him and it's billy bob thorton. He then (still completely unsolicited) goes on and on to me about why he likes them, what other foods he likes there and his food allergies. ALL OF THEM.

strangely i took his suggestion and loved the chicken. I had completely forgotten about this until my friend kristin was talking about billy bob last week. For some reason i was thinking bout this conversation on sunday while I was hungry and I thought to myself, you know what I really want, those chicken nuggets from whole foods. and i went to get them.

Now billy bob will forever be in my brain associated with the bevely hills whole food chicken nuggets. How strange that a conversatoin about billy bob days before helped solve my food question... just thought i'd share.

i'm not computer savvy.

some of my recent posts were accidently deleted when I checked a whole bunch of them and then clicked delete in stead of save.

sorry.

visited Kristin's set again today (went to the un burned back lot of universal on saturday and spent a few hours there watching them film the mexican carnival scene)

anyway, today they're filming in a boutique on 3rd street right around the corner from me. Bernsie and janie are extras!! anyway, I was walking through the store and needed to get around someone and said "excuse me" only to find out that "someone" was a mannequin.

secret shopper

like i said in my last post i'm being a secret shopper tonight at a nice sushi restuarant in LA. And i'm psyched for free food, but I have to fill out like a 10 page form about everything from the moment I call to make a ressie to the minute we leave valet!! but here is what my friend Amy (who is one of my best friends out here and is a mom with 2 young kids so i'm taking her with me for a night away from the family treat) and I have to eat tonight. And as many of you know, i dont like to eat big dinners so this is going to cause me to have nightmares tonight because all the food I'm going to ingest. (the nightmares will not come from eating so much food but I get nightmares when I eat big meals, it's weird, i know but what can you do?)

AT THE BAR - 1 DRINK PER PERSON BEFORE OR AFTER DINNER

AT THE TABLE - ONE COCKTAIL EACH, ONE SHARED APPETIZER, ONE SOUP OR SALAD EACH, ONE ENTREE EACH, ONE DESSERT PER PERSON, ONE COFFFE/TEA PER PERSON

how am i possibly going to be able to consume all the food"?!?!!?!


but i'm super excited!!!!!

do you ever have those days when you just can't seem to focus on what you need to accomplish? These days are brutal on a writer with a deadline. I have to pitch to my producer over at SONY on wednesday and I have to really develop the world of the show I'm ptiching then write the pitch, all of which i was hoping to.. well not finish, but at least start today and for some reason I have done everything but do this. I have accomplished nothing. IN fact when I type this, i'm going to the gym to run instead of working on my pitch. And it's not like something I can phone in, i am going to be sitting in a room opposite my producer, just the 2 of us while I pitch this and it has to be clear, concise, funny oh and a viable idea that she can envision as a tv show. If not, we're back to square one. So the fact that I can't concentrate on my only really reason for getting out of bed this a.m. is DRIVING ME BATTY!

I do however, now have a clean apartment floor as I swifter-ed it and vacuumed and took out the trash, walked to the grocery store, met a friend for coffee, helped her re-do her pitch for paramount and then played on the internet. BTW I liked life a lot more when I had a maid cleaning my place. I've had one almost my entire life so to now not have someone clean my apt. because I can't really spend the money on it is also DRIVING ME FUCKING BATTY.

while at peetes coffee today on larchmont, i saw a lot of people carrying around yoga mats, i need to do this next time I head to larchmont (a ritzy upscale street in LA that is so super cute, has adorable shops, the best pizza in LA and reminds me of scarsdale) I also saw tina majorino, she was the little girl from "when a man loves a woman," she was in napolean dynomite and also she's in big love on HBO. she was walking with some TV exec. I saw someone else famous today too but can't remember who... I went to bed at 1am and then woke up at 6am maybe that's why i'm all over the place today.

last night i went to dinner with my tennis class girls, we're all soo different yet we all get along so well, we range in ages from 45 to 25, from australia to marietta GA, from Catholic to Jewish, from writers to hotel industry employees. we had a fantastic time!!! Damn, i love tennis.

MY SURPRISE PARTY PICS

Steve and bernsie pretending they are at a major rager!



bernsie, kristin, Gunn!

me with the boys (check out the sign in the background)


me, carrie (from high school), danielle and bernsie



me, adam (so hot!), bryan (we dated and his engagment party is the one i went to this weekend), kate and morgan.



me, bernsie and bryan.



me, amy and bernsie!

last week i was working at universal studios. i parked in the muddy waters parking lot and had to walk through the back lot in order to get to Kristin's office. I walked through it 2 a day for 3 days, also walked through it every day when I worked there 6 years ago. Anyway, now the back lot has been burned to pieces. So sad to think I may have been one of the last people to see the back to the future clocktower set...

anyway, i was walking through there the other day when all of a sudden a black BMW almost hits me. I look at the person driving and thought it was my agent, Greg, but as I looked closer i see it's the actor, the guy I used to live with. well, not live with but lived in his house with him. anyway, he's doing a spot on CSI and was there for a wardrobe fitting and yeah, he narrowly missed me! he gave me a ride to kristin's office and said "how funny would that have been if I hit you, got out of the car and was like I'm so sorry-- Sarah?"

Hilarious that would've been!

today I at the Writers Guild reading some scripts and then I need to send off an email to the ABC drama exec who i met with a few weeks ago to tell her if I liked them. of course I will say I loved them all, b/c i want a fucking job!

weekend

this weekend went by fast. I was driving today thinking, i hate when the weekend is over cause that means i'm supposed to do something with my life starting tomorrow. unfortuatnely it appears that SONY is taking their sweet time on deciding on which idea i'm going to develop for them this year. so i have nothing to do!! i know this sounds like a dream to some, but i assure you it sucks so much balls to open your eyes every morning and look up at the ceiling thinking i could stay here alll freakin day and no one would ever know.

yesterday i went to my friend/ex engagement party. the party called for "hoedown" wear. Now for a girl from NY i do not have any hoedown type garb. so the closest thing I had was a red bandana that i wore on my head and a white skirt that COULD be seen as a western outfit, but was really more a hippie outfit. my friends were all wearing cowboy boots and plaid cowboy shirts and cowboy hats and took one look at me and here are the comments i got:


YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE GOING TO LALAPALOOZA
I'M SORRY DID THE INVITE SAY AN AUNT JAMIMA THEMED PARTY?

so needless to say the party was my worst nightmare with all these atrocious outfits and then country music?!?! and the food was from zeke's BBq. so there were ribs and pulled chicken and baked beans and basically everything I woudl NEVER eat. Now I'm sure many know I have major food issues, mostly because of the foodbourne illnesses i have had in the past, so as you can imagine, i'm not an adventourous eater when it comes to shit like pulled chicken and fucking ribs!!!

well, I bailed right after the food arrived to hit the Sex and the city movie with remi, carrie and the gang. BTW the movie was terrible, but so freakin delicious for a fan like myself!!! so i looved every 140 minutes of it!! and so did the rest of the arclight audience, people were clapping and hollaring. yeah, i'm a freakin cliche and loved every second of it.

after wards we headed to the well, which is my least fave place in LA and got a drink. I passed on the drink and headed home early since I was so freakin tired from working all week on the ABC pilot.

alright, off to the gym!

working for a living

hey all, been working on kristin's pilot like crazy these days. Worked until midnight last night and then worked all evening today. but we ordered dinner from Katsuya which is the best sushi in LA!!! so it was all worth it!

I'm having the best time being back in the writers room yukking it up with some of the old guys from that 70s show. It's so much fun!!! i've missed this!!! and Kristin is doing really great considering we've had to re-write the entire script.

I was supposed to read the part of Joy at yesterday's table read but then last minute was re-cast. boo! the part is now cut, but it would've have been had I read the lines!! oh yeah, i practiced and practiced and would've hit it out of the ball park.

tomorrow I'm so excited, I'm hiking at 8am, playing tennis at 10am then working all day again on the script over at universal studios. Saturday i have a engagement party for my ex boyfriend, and then sat. night i'm going to ssee sex and the city with a big group of friends. we're making it a night of it, drinks before hand and I think we're going to the over 21 showing at the arclight so I think we can bring drinks in! either way, i'm fucking psyched!

today i'm back in the tv hollywood world. going to my friend kristin's table read for her pilot. a table read is where the entire cast sits around a table and reads her script for her show. then the network and studio gives her notes and then we writers go help her make it better based on the network and studio notes and we re-write jokes we thought worked and story plots that need to be fixed.

it will be fun! i'm reading the part of Joy in the script because I guess they haven't cast Joy yet so I'm going to be in front of the entire ABC network, dreams works and all the trained actors on the cast and say some lines!! i hope i dont fuck it up!!! wish me luck! who knows maybe i'll have a new career.

YOu're probably wondering why I'm updating my blog so much today. I'm bored and it's raining in LA. I've now decided to complain about men in general. I sometimes wish I was a lesbian and wonder if woman put other woman through the hoops that men put woman through. I'm also kind of embarrassed what I allow guys to do to me, like what I put up with in order to make something work. this more accurate for relationships in the past then current ones, altho i dont currently have one but you know what I mean. I suppose more recent ones would be an more accurate description.

I was in this meeting with ABC drama last week and the woman told me that people dont come to LA to settle down, that's why so many woman mostly have a hard time finding someone here. They come to follow dreams and live a fairly unrealistic life (quite frankly exactly like the one I have been leading what with my hollywood premieres, TV show job, being part of a celeb entourage albeit breifly) I think her assesment of LA was quite on target.

fran

the last time I was home, i realized something about my mom who totally rules. Well actually this isn't a new realization, but one that started to grate on me. Here's what happened and maybe you can figure out what hte problem is...

we get in the car and drive to bellas, my fave b'fast restuarant. my mom gets the newpapers, gets into the car and sings "oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beuatiful day..." the entire song.

In bellas we were talking about being old and how it sucks to grow up. My mother immediately broke into another song "I wont grow up" from Peter Pan

On the way home I commented on something out of the window and this inspired my mom to break into song again.

Then during lunch preparations, she started to sing another song about heating up tea! How does this woman: A. know so many songs and B. know so many songs that apply to such specific situations?!! Like heating up tea for example, who knew that was a lyric in any song?! MY MOTHER!!

it's just weird because it's not like she was the star of stage and screen or something, she just sings for no apparent reason. IT'S WEIRD!! and this isn't a new thing, she's done it for years, but i think the afflication is getting worse.

UPDATE: JUST GOT OFF THE PHONE WITH FRAN, AND I WAS TALKING ABOUT A TICKET I NEEDED TO GET FOR MY FRIEND NOAH'S WEDDING BUT HE HASN'T NAILED DOWN A DATE FOR HIS AUGUST NUPTUIALS. ANYWAY, MY MOM STARTED SINGING "SHE'S GOT A TICKET TO RIDE," INSTEAD OF LISTENING TO THE REST OF THE CONVO... SERIOUSLY PEOPLE DO YOU KNOW ANYONE ELSE WITH THIS ILLNESS, PLEASE CONTACT ME ASAP!!

babysitting

i think the weirdest day of one's life might be the day they meet or hear that the kids they babysat for are now college graduates. I just got an email from one of the woman whose kids I used to baby sit for. she wished me happy birthday then went on to update me. her oldest just graduated from college last weekend. Her youngest is going to be a junior in college. I met these girls when they were 5 and 7! I mean, it blows my mind! blows my mind. Why am I so old? who allowed this to happen? Not I.

there are 2 other girls I used to babysit for who have been out of college for a number of years, and I still can't wrap my head around it when I run into them whenever I'm home in NY for a visit. They're real people instead of little kids I'd run around after dressed up as a boogie man or some other strange character. Anyway, perhaps this post is a just a reflection of my passing birthday and movement on in the years!!

SURPRISE!

omg last night i was all ready to go with berna and kristin to see "sex and the city" screening. At least that's what I thought i was doing. On the walk over to the movie theatre, kristin wanted to stop in and see this wine bar we used to go to b./c it cahnged ownership and was like 'hey I want to poke my head in to see what it looks like" so she opened the door and i stood back on the sidewalk waiting and she opens the door and there's a sign that says "happy bday sarah mac" and i think to myself "thats funny thats my name too!" and then i see my friend chris and i think "what a coincidence Chris is at this bar and i'm walking by, this town is so small" and then everyone says suprise!!! AND IT WAS A SUPRISE PARTY FOR ME AND I'M TOO STUPID TO REALIZE IT!!!

i saw words sarah mac and didn't think it was for me!!! WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME!

I WAS SO FREAKIN SURPRISED and a little disappointed that i didn't see the sex and the city movie, not gonna lie!

but my friends were like "that was the best surprise ever because the look on your face was priceless," now let it be known that this is the 2nd surprise i've had in 5 years and the same thing happened last time too, i had no freakin idea and was kinda freaked out by the shock of it all.

but it seriously was an awesome night. berna pillaged my list of facebook friends and contacted those she had never even met before and was got all these people on the evite list!!

also i got totally and completely shitfaced. It was so fun to see so many friends to come out to celebrete ME! there were flowers and pizza and crudite and balloons and gifts, people brought gifts!!!!

cool, righ?

on tues i'm going to the spa. every year I go to the spa and to church on my bday! but i'll be getting a 90 min deep tissue massage and spending the day by the pool!! cannot wait!!

anyway, it was a good night. a great super fun happy night! I just feel so stupid again that I had no idea, AGAIN!

meetings

this is the week all the shows get picked up for the new tv season. well due to the strike many shows are not even shot yet so they wont be hiring for a few more months. ugh! anyway, i have lots of meetings and had a bunch last week but the show i had the best meeting on probably isn't going to get picked up. Its annoying since i spend hours reading the script, coming up with ideas, stuff to talk about, get dressed, drive to burbank, sit in the meeting, and then drive back, basically taking up 2 days including prep only to find out the show isn't even getting picked up and i have no job after all that?!?!??!?! SUCK!!

yesterday I filed for unemployment again, i get to sign up every may and it lasts for a few months. it's not much money and doesn't cover any of my expenses, well maybe cable and my cell phone but i'll take it. I have no idea if I qualify seeing as in order to get unemployment you have to have earned money in the past year which sadly I didn't earn much, but who knows, i thought i'd give it a shot.

weekends

weekends to me are the same as weekedays. pretty much nothing happens. I guess I have a few more friends around that are off work, but mostly my friends are all unemployed writers so they're around all day every day anyway. It just means there are more people in the brunch places, that's all.

friday night i went to liz's to watch Grizzy man documentary. if you haven't seen it, it's brilliant and when i mention it to people since, a ton of people are like I know i saw that and it's amazing. then i wonder why hasn't anyone told me about this gem of a film. Seriouly stop what youer' doing right now and watch it! not to be believed!!! it's about a guy who goes and lives with bears in alaska and eventually gets eaten by them becaues the bears are like "WTF is this guy doing thinking he's one of us!"

on saturday I went to my friend natalyas and hung out with her and her son who is 1.5 years old. he's so freakin cute. I used to work with her hubby so it was fun to see them. I went to talk career advice with Nat as she's super smart and gives great advice. They then asked me to come to dinner with them and we hit up the grove which was a mistake since there were like 10000000 people there and it was all too overwhelming for a person who sits at home alone all day. we had dinner, checked out barnes and noble and then I came home and went to bed. I had donated blood earlier in the day so was kinda wiped out.


Saw jeremy piven the other day at lulus cafe on beverly. I hate that guy. arrogance just oozes out of him while he's crouched over drinking his vanilla latte and egg whites. I just want to punch him in the face every time I see him.



oh and a great sighting was Kevin Connoly from entourage at my Catholic church last night, I've seen him once before, like 2 years ago, but he stayed for the entire mass, he's very cute, very irish so naturally i'm attracted to him, but he's too short for me!!

also on my way into church i saw a yellow VW bug and thought my friend Matija who used to live in LA but now lives in san fran was at church since she's the only person i know who drives one of those! so i got excited only to walk by the car and see it was an enterprise rental, very disappointing.

hey everyone, i've been back in LA for about a week and basicaly done nothing with my life. friday night i met up with remi for her bday and they had dinner somewhere but I met them for drinks at this place called vermont where we were in a minor battle with TR Knight's posse, AKA george o'malley. he's so tiny!!! anyway, his people insisted our table was reserved for his big group and they had some bossy big blonde lady trying to convince us of that, but in fact carrie had reserved that table for us!

in leiu of bday cake carrie had an assortment of cupcakes, omg so freaking good!! what a great idea. I felt bad that i was so freakin tired from all the wedding stuff the week before and the travelling that I had to leave early.

saturday went to david's surprise 40th at village idiot, it was in the back room and it was awesome! great food and seriously, rent that space it's freakin awesome if you're ever looking for a place to have a party. the service was fantastic!

this week i have a few meetings, i want a job, i want to be on a show, i'm so sick of not having a job it's driving me crazy!!! the next few weeks should be interesting as it's sorta staffing season, the annual rush to get writers jobs on tv shows, but due to the strike not all the shows are ready to be shot and ready to hire now so that might happen in a few months, thats annoying because it would be nice to afford my rent.

party time

I am right now in NY for emma's wedding. well her wedding happened on sat. and it was a rocking good time. my calves are so sore right now from all the jumping around and dancing! I have never heard croatian music before that night, but certaintly danced like i had been doing it all my life... must've been the booze!

I looked amazing in my black bridesmaid dress with a honey dew sash! the ceremony was amazing, there wasn't a dry eye in the church (well excpet mine since I dont cry and emma's since she has no tear ducts) we took loads of pics, were driven everywhere in the limos, ate, drank, was very merry. I had such a blast, i think i danced with every guy there, including the brides father who I believe I led and at one point even dipped!! oh yes!! did i mention there was lot of booze!

then we went to the after party and ran into a girl i went to high school with and alyson one of the other bridesmaid was drunk and mad at me for something that i had nothing to do with, but anyway she told me to "just go home" (we've made up) and so i caught a ride with the girl from high schoool who freaking worked at the hotel we werea after partying at!!! hilar! it was like 3:3oam before I even got home (had gotten up at 7am that day) I made it home with all my shoes and makeup and camera and I.D. etc. thankfully my parents were in Philly and didn't have to see me! when i get back to LA i'll upload the pics!

the best man who i figured I was going to make out with was hot and bothered with another lady, so this sinlge bridesmaid went back to her childhood bed in her parents house alllll alone!!! oh well, my choices were pretty limited, unless I wanted to take home my friend Tina's dad!

sorry for the lack of posts. I've continued to be horrible sick with acute athamatic bronchitis. breathing has been a strange thing for me the past few days.

anyway, i've also been out and about pretending i'm not sick and enjoying my life. I've seen a number of movies, had a few beers (i haven't drank beer in years) and playing tennis. My friend jen and I play every tues. morning at 10 at the bev hills tennis club (sounds fancy but it's a public court) sure i dont have a job and i'm totally poor, but still at least i'm trying to find the silver lining. Last night i went on a hike with kristin to a place, runyon canyon i"ve gone a million of times and she took me down a completely different path and it blew my mind. how did i not know this path existed and gave even a more spectacular view?!?! after living here for 12 freakin years, i can still learn something about this city. fantastic!

leaving tomoro for NY for emma's wedding, i'm a bridesmaid, cant wait should be fun even though i've been on all these steroids to help me breath for 3 weeks and I'm all bloated and ugly. sorry, what can you do? not my fault my lungs hate me.

greetings friends. I would like to wish my cold a happy 3rd week anniversary. Oh yes, i have been sick with a cold for about 3 weeks. It sucks. I finally went to the doctor on thursday only to be yelled at. It seems I had both a sinus infection and severe bronchitis which to a person with asthma like myself can be life threatening, I figured as much as I was drowning in my own muscus on wed. night. It's weird how you can actually feel the inside of your lungs?!1 anyway, I'm now on a major anti biotic and 2 inhalers (one with steroids, i'm hoping i h=get roid rage!! how fun would that be!) and feeling much better, despite thinking I was going to have to go to the hospital on saturday b/c i thought i had pnuemonia!

anyway, today I have an article due at fandango that i haven't even started since I was so sick and very busy watching maid in manhattan and coyote ugly!

last week i worked on a pilot at Paramount for NBC. I don't get paid in these situations, but usually they send a gift, we'll see. anyway, it was so much fun to be back on a set, pitching jokes, the only annoying thing were the people, well one writer in particualr who when he was off somewhere else and woudl come back and hear a joke someone had pitched while he was away he'd be like 'who said that who gets credit, who gets credit" and i realized I woudl hate to work with him. That's the competitive mentality i hate when working on a show. "who's joke was that. who gets credit" its susually a collaborative effort where someone pitches an area and then together everyone builds on it, but by pointing out who gets credit, it makes everyone else feel like they did nothing and the one who pitched the final wording is the genius. I swear i wanted to punch this guy in the face when he kepts saying it for 2 days straight. anyway, the show is really funny, and i hope gets on the air and i hope they hire me!!!!

celebrity sighting round up

I have a ton of celeb sightings!!!



on thurs I was driving by orso, a very actory type restaurant which is about 4 blocks from my house and I stopped because of traffic and looked over and saw Josh Jackson and his Girlfriend. Josh jackson who played pacey on dawson's creek. and let me just say he is looking MIGHTY FUCKING FINE!!!!! have you guys seen him lately?!?! yum yum, i wanted to lick him!!! but the light turned green and I had to go but DAMN!!




on saturday I was driving to my friend carrie's house when I drove by the park at coldwater canyon and saw all the paps lined up taking pics so I slowed down to see Gwen steffani with her son, pushing him on some two wheeler. she was all glam on an early sat. morn. By the time I had brunch and got home the pics of her day at the park were already up on people.com!!!



Just now I am currently staring at Eric Stolz from every 80s movie under the sun and once again may i say DAMN!! he's in the writers guild lounge for some reason. I looked over and there he was grabbing a bathroom key. he's in the small conference room with some people, i didn't recognize them, which means they're not regulars here as i have been given the title "mayor of the writers guild lounge!"

last night i went out for kristin's party, she sold her pilot which is good news for me since I helped her write it and if it gets picked up to series I'll have a job!! woo hoo! and then I can afford coffee again! oh yeah, since the sky rocketing pricetag of my accident and medical bills (from 2007) and car repairs, i have had to cut out coffee bean, 2 bucks a day instead of going to my gut goes to my credit card. so every 5 days i'm going to send a check via my bank to the credit card companies to help pay for stuff. ugh, being poor is a fucking nightmare!!

every day at the wrtiers guild there is a woman who comes to write and often sits across from me, well she sits a lot of places. moves aroudn the lounge she moves like 4 time a day sometimes twice in one hour. anyway, whenever she sits on the couches where is usually her first stop, she falls asleep. just sits there with her computer on her lap, eyes closed. this happens every day. and i watch her as her eyes slowly close and she tries to battle them to stay open but is unsuccesful, oh, right now she is up again, i'll keep you updated.

i've been sick for a week and I'm so tired! ugh! last night greg S drove me home from krisine's and then came inside to give me a pep talk about my life. he gave me some valuable advice about trying to figure out what i want to do with my life. well, not my life but what I want to do next. we shall see. I just wish someone would just tell me what to do, that would be so much easier. i hate being a grown up.

back in la!! went to emma's bachlorette party in SF this weekend with the rest of the bridesmaids and had a great time even though I had bronchitis and didnt get to go out as late as the rest of the girls. I'm still plagued with the illness as I'm too lazy to go see a doctor.

we toured the vineyards of napa in high style, a very tacky cheesy lame ass white limo that was PERFECT@! a freakin white limo, i didn't even know they made those anymore! we went to like 5 vineyards and at one my spot had about 10 empty champagne glassses! yeah, I was a bit faced! all the girls rallied to head out that night after a day of drinking, but I was too dizzy to stand let alone go to some bar so I stayed back and fell asleep watching bridget jones diary 2.

flew home sunday and have been in la since. I know am driving a rental car that i freakin hate, a ford focus which is a shit box but what can you do? I should get my car back next week, cannot wait, i miss it, but mostly because I left a whole bunch of laundry in it and now I don't have clean sock or my tennis racket which is in the truck! grrrr!! i didn't plan that well!

anyway, back to resting!!

so immediately after my accident last week my parents flew me home to NY. I just clarely had such a bad run of bad luck and I was so wound up and the pressure and stress and mental toll was all to much. I got into the acciddent at 2 called them around 3pm and was on a plane that night. My dad said i was so upset on the phone he thought I had killed someone. No, not someone, just someone's jaguar.

so i have been hiding out in ny recovering from whip lash and all my mental scarring. I'm glad I came home, turns out it was easter so I had a great time with my family and then started being spotted in my small town and in the church I go to and had to tell people I was home. It was fine, by then I was ready to get off my parents couch, although not behind a wheel. basically my friends just pick me up and drive me whereever they're going, i tag along. today I went swimming which i read is good for shoulder, neck and back injuries, so that felt good. my dad and I split a lane, hehe! pretty funny. we have matching goggles.

tonight my friend BJ and her kids and I went up to briarcliff to her sister cathy's sweet ass condo. I think one of my basketball coaches now works for the NBA pretty high up so i'm going to contact her about employment opporutnities there. Very excited about that. that should be cool. we had yummy spinach pizza tonight and played with the kids and gossiped about everyone we know. it's fun to do that with people you have known for over 15 years! it's not the same with the friends i've only had a few years, not that I dont cherish those relationships. I def. do, but still. anyway, I emailed with one of my friends today and he just gave me a great email reply when I told him I had to miss lunch b/c I was in ny due to this accident and my nervous breakdown, he said the nicest things, I just love getting those types of emails. Although now more and more I'm getting condolence emails and phone calls from people who are starting to hear about my accident etc as the news trickles out since I just picked up in left hours after the accident took place. lets see how nice they're going to be when they have to drive me everywhere when i go back to LA cause I'll be without a car for who knows how long. suck!

I WON THE LOTTERY

I bought a mega millions ticket the morning after my accident and guess what?!?! I WON!!! I WON THREE DOLLARS!! it's something right?!!?!?!

what should i spend it on? i dont want to spend it all on one place so as one would imagine that really narrows down my options. YIPPEE!!!

she's being aggressive

She's very AGGRESSIVE. this is what i just heard from my insurance company. My poor insurance compnay who i've only had for like 3 months and they have to deal with a COMPLETE lunatic that was involved in the accident with me. This woman was screaming at me and now i can only imagine what they're dealing with. As a result of this revelation and warning from my insurance company, i can no longer divulge information about the accident. Just know we were both at fault (my side) she on the other hand has a different view of the story. It's very complicated.

today was Good Friday, I've always wondered why it's called "Good Friday" since it's the day Jesus died. Actually I do know the answer, but it still bewilders me.

I would also like to apologize to my faithful readers who day after day come to my blog to read something witty or funny only to find out that I have suffered more bad luck, have slipped further into my depression and have completely lost the will to live. I'm sorry, I just can't seem to catch a break, I hope you know that since i'm reading "When Bad things happen to good people" (thanks mom!)... wel, I dont want to say I know I'm going to be okay and i'm going to get through this because if you scroll through my days it only keeps getting worse, but lets just leave it at that I'm reading this "when bad things happen to good people book," and that's that.

hmmm i guess the bird poop thing wasn't good luck after all. On monday I had a car repair for $1100. Tues I got a rejection letter for an entry level trainee job saying I didn't have the right qualifications!! FOR AN ENTRY LEVEL JOB and then on wednesday i got into a big car accident with a screaming lady, a lunatic insane lady who my insurance company told me today is being very "aggressive" with them and causing a lot of problems. (less than 24 hours after the accident) oh and a sassy black bus driver who first said I hit her bus too and then 10 mins later said "no wait you didn't hit my bus." so she's the "credible witness" for the entire case. Oh and i did happen to mention the botoxed lady was driving a brand new Jaguar?! yeah, awesome! I think I cried more yesterday than I have in... well only bout 2 weeks. but today is the first day of the rest of my life.

p.s. okay that is pic is not what happened!! oh and the $1100 car repair is gonna have to be completely redone! but it's okay, i'm gonna be ok and it could've been worse!! (at least that what some guy told me when he saw me standing by my car just staring at it glazed over about 30 mins after the accidnet)

good luck

I hear getting pooped on by a bird is good luck. any one have any idea what that is based on? I just got pooped on so I was curious!?@!

this week i went up to santa barbara with my cousin mo and her 2 girls to check out colleges for one of the girls. it was a small Christian college in montecito, so ridiculously beautiful and very very very small. I convinced Hannah to go to Pepperdine in Malibu, i wanted to go there but my parents were against it. check out the picture of this campus!!! come on!!! amazing. So that woudl be cool, hannah is a very cool girl. its weird to think that when she was 1 years old that was the last time I took a road trip with her and her parents, and now i'm road tripping with her TO COLLEGES!!!

life is going by waaaay too fast!

yesterday I went to a baby shower for my friend erika. it was reallllly nice of course, all my friends are TOTALLY RICH RICH RICH!! I am not. but that has been well established. anyway, she was opening presents and wondered where this one woman was who RSVP-ed and I was like I dont know her and she was like yes you do, you know Kerry Anderson and I was like no, I dont and this is how ther est of the conversation went.

Her: Kerry Anderson, you know Kerry Anderson. Kerry Anderson?
me: no I have no idea who she is
Her: Kerry Anderson. (turns to our friends) She's met Kerry Anderson right?
Jenny: yeah, you know Kerry Anderson she was at my shower
Me: i swear I dont know Kerry Anderson
Jenny: yes you do, she does, she met her at my shower
her: Kerry Anderson, you know her.
me: you can keep saying her name, but my answer isn't going to change.
Jenny: no, you know her, you just dont know it.

me: (in my head): oh, ok.???

Post tenebras spero lucem ("After darkness I hope for light")

Ive decided I'm no longer JOB from the Bible. Job is the guy who is repeatedly tested by God to see his faith and God gives him the most UNBELIEVABLE bad luck and just heaps it on him more and more and more and more, killing his wife and kids and taking away everything. For more info read about it here. ALL ABOUT BAD LUCK JOBFor most of 2 years now I've thought I was JOB, the modern day JOB, i do not have a wife and kids to take away but everything else I have had stripped from me.

But today I've decided I'm Lazarus, another Biblical character who Jesus rises from the dead, resurects, more like ressucitates. I have decided I am now Lazarus, I am on the rise.

TOday I picked up a mail from the actors house and found a medical bill, no surprsie there, I'm drowning in medical bills, this is one for $7,000 from 2005 when I was sick after Africa. My insurance woudln't pay it. I had 2 procedures done with a doctor in their network who did said procedures at a non-network place and they would only pay $3000 of the 10,000 so that left with me $7000. I told my doctor last year I couldn't pay it, and it wasn fair since I was using him a in network doctor that I should be penalized becaue he was using a non network surgery center for my stomach stuff. So he told me to fax him the bill and he'd try and work something out, i'd probably have to pay some of it, but not a of it. This is a doctor who I have developed a good report with seeing as I'm always in there with ailments that "only 65 year old men have, not women your ag" that's a direct quote. he was also the one who told me to go to the ER b/c I was having an appendicitis, needless to say this guy has watched the hits keep on coming with me. Anyway, it took a long time for me to get it togethet to mail the bill to him but I did and then never really heard anythign.

until today.

Like i said I went to the old homestead to pick up my mail and there was the bill from the surgery center. I thought for sure I was going to open it and see a figure that I wasn't too keen on paying but much to my surprise the leter said my balance was ZERO! nada, zilch, nothing!!!! My luck is changing! I still have thousands to pay for my medical bills last year, but this one bill was weighing on me for years!!!!!

woo hoo, I feel like I won the lottery, I am like the phoenix, I am rising from the ashes, I'm back in the high life again!

free screening

last night this guy i went on a date with in dec and a few more in jan called me out of the blue. he had disappeared in jan, (after the date where he called me at 830am to ask me to a free movie screening that night) only to send me an email in feb congratulating me that the strike was over and so i replied "i was wondering what happened to you" something to drive home my attitude of "WTF where did u go?" then i followed it up with yes, thanks for the email blah blah.

THEN NOTHING

then last night he called me at like 930pm to invite me to a screening (another one, it's the only thing he ever calls me to do, a free movie screening, he really knows how to make a girl feel special.) for 4pm today, but i was like Um I have to work.... and he said maybe we could get drinks after if i couldn't make the screening, but I already have plans!! WHO IS THIS GUY? HE CALLS LIKE 2 SECS BEFORE HE WANTS TO HANG OUT. now i know you're all thinking Jeez, give it a rest, at least he's calling, but honestly, a 16 hour notice isn't enough. I'm not saying i'm popular, but I don't see people alllll day long andit's really lonely so as a result I book my nights up way in advance becaues I need to see people and not feel so isolated, so i'm ususally booked up at least 10 days in advance. it's something I know i have to do to keep remotely sane! so i called him back today and left a message and haven't heard back. i'm sure in 3 weeks I"ll hear from him again!

WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

i handed in my pilot to my agents and they loved it but want me to do a re-write so we had a conference call yesterday and i've come out of it not understanding WTF they're trying to say. The thing about agents and TV execs is they get their job after answering a phone for a few years and then get promoted. The thing about writers is, they have to answer the phone for a few years BUT ALSO WRITE SCRIPTS AND IMPROVE THEIR CRAFT. you see the difference. In what other industry do people who answer the phone get promoted into a job that requires understanding of script development, story building, character?!?!? NO OTHER THAT'S WHY THERE IS SO MUCH BAD TV. the people who are giving notes HAVE NO EXPERIENCE DOING SO!!!! They're just trying to sound smart so as not to lose their job THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE IN THE FIRST PLACE. So sure agents listened in on all their bosses phone calls when they were assistants, so they hear phrases and words that execs and agents say that sound like they have meaning (they think the person on the other end knows what htey're talkinga bout) but really they're just saying a lot of words but it means nothing. I'm not sure you can fully understand this until you have had it happen to you.

so yesterday on the phone my agents said a lot of words but didn't really say anything concrete or of any value that will help me in my rewrite and this makes it difficult as one would imagine. I just want to be done with this script and send it out and maybe sell it (long shot, but crazier things have happened)