weekends

weekends to me are the same as weekedays. pretty much nothing happens. I guess I have a few more friends around that are off work, but mostly my friends are all unemployed writers so they're around all day every day anyway. It just means there are more people in the brunch places, that's all.

friday night i went to liz's to watch Grizzy man documentary. if you haven't seen it, it's brilliant and when i mention it to people since, a ton of people are like I know i saw that and it's amazing. then i wonder why hasn't anyone told me about this gem of a film. Seriouly stop what youer' doing right now and watch it! not to be believed!!! it's about a guy who goes and lives with bears in alaska and eventually gets eaten by them becaues the bears are like "WTF is this guy doing thinking he's one of us!"

on saturday I went to my friend natalyas and hung out with her and her son who is 1.5 years old. he's so freakin cute. I used to work with her hubby so it was fun to see them. I went to talk career advice with Nat as she's super smart and gives great advice. They then asked me to come to dinner with them and we hit up the grove which was a mistake since there were like 10000000 people there and it was all too overwhelming for a person who sits at home alone all day. we had dinner, checked out barnes and noble and then I came home and went to bed. I had donated blood earlier in the day so was kinda wiped out.


Saw jeremy piven the other day at lulus cafe on beverly. I hate that guy. arrogance just oozes out of him while he's crouched over drinking his vanilla latte and egg whites. I just want to punch him in the face every time I see him.



oh and a great sighting was Kevin Connoly from entourage at my Catholic church last night, I've seen him once before, like 2 years ago, but he stayed for the entire mass, he's very cute, very irish so naturally i'm attracted to him, but he's too short for me!!

also on my way into church i saw a yellow VW bug and thought my friend Matija who used to live in LA but now lives in san fran was at church since she's the only person i know who drives one of those! so i got excited only to walk by the car and see it was an enterprise rental, very disappointing.

hey everyone, i've been back in LA for about a week and basicaly done nothing with my life. friday night i met up with remi for her bday and they had dinner somewhere but I met them for drinks at this place called vermont where we were in a minor battle with TR Knight's posse, AKA george o'malley. he's so tiny!!! anyway, his people insisted our table was reserved for his big group and they had some bossy big blonde lady trying to convince us of that, but in fact carrie had reserved that table for us!

in leiu of bday cake carrie had an assortment of cupcakes, omg so freaking good!! what a great idea. I felt bad that i was so freakin tired from all the wedding stuff the week before and the travelling that I had to leave early.

saturday went to david's surprise 40th at village idiot, it was in the back room and it was awesome! great food and seriously, rent that space it's freakin awesome if you're ever looking for a place to have a party. the service was fantastic!

this week i have a few meetings, i want a job, i want to be on a show, i'm so sick of not having a job it's driving me crazy!!! the next few weeks should be interesting as it's sorta staffing season, the annual rush to get writers jobs on tv shows, but due to the strike not all the shows are ready to be shot and ready to hire now so that might happen in a few months, thats annoying because it would be nice to afford my rent.

party time

I am right now in NY for emma's wedding. well her wedding happened on sat. and it was a rocking good time. my calves are so sore right now from all the jumping around and dancing! I have never heard croatian music before that night, but certaintly danced like i had been doing it all my life... must've been the booze!

I looked amazing in my black bridesmaid dress with a honey dew sash! the ceremony was amazing, there wasn't a dry eye in the church (well excpet mine since I dont cry and emma's since she has no tear ducts) we took loads of pics, were driven everywhere in the limos, ate, drank, was very merry. I had such a blast, i think i danced with every guy there, including the brides father who I believe I led and at one point even dipped!! oh yes!! did i mention there was lot of booze!

then we went to the after party and ran into a girl i went to high school with and alyson one of the other bridesmaid was drunk and mad at me for something that i had nothing to do with, but anyway she told me to "just go home" (we've made up) and so i caught a ride with the girl from high schoool who freaking worked at the hotel we werea after partying at!!! hilar! it was like 3:3oam before I even got home (had gotten up at 7am that day) I made it home with all my shoes and makeup and camera and I.D. etc. thankfully my parents were in Philly and didn't have to see me! when i get back to LA i'll upload the pics!

the best man who i figured I was going to make out with was hot and bothered with another lady, so this sinlge bridesmaid went back to her childhood bed in her parents house alllll alone!!! oh well, my choices were pretty limited, unless I wanted to take home my friend Tina's dad!

sorry for the lack of posts. I've continued to be horrible sick with acute athamatic bronchitis. breathing has been a strange thing for me the past few days.

anyway, i've also been out and about pretending i'm not sick and enjoying my life. I've seen a number of movies, had a few beers (i haven't drank beer in years) and playing tennis. My friend jen and I play every tues. morning at 10 at the bev hills tennis club (sounds fancy but it's a public court) sure i dont have a job and i'm totally poor, but still at least i'm trying to find the silver lining. Last night i went on a hike with kristin to a place, runyon canyon i"ve gone a million of times and she took me down a completely different path and it blew my mind. how did i not know this path existed and gave even a more spectacular view?!?! after living here for 12 freakin years, i can still learn something about this city. fantastic!

leaving tomoro for NY for emma's wedding, i'm a bridesmaid, cant wait should be fun even though i've been on all these steroids to help me breath for 3 weeks and I'm all bloated and ugly. sorry, what can you do? not my fault my lungs hate me.

greetings friends. I would like to wish my cold a happy 3rd week anniversary. Oh yes, i have been sick with a cold for about 3 weeks. It sucks. I finally went to the doctor on thursday only to be yelled at. It seems I had both a sinus infection and severe bronchitis which to a person with asthma like myself can be life threatening, I figured as much as I was drowning in my own muscus on wed. night. It's weird how you can actually feel the inside of your lungs?!1 anyway, I'm now on a major anti biotic and 2 inhalers (one with steroids, i'm hoping i h=get roid rage!! how fun would that be!) and feeling much better, despite thinking I was going to have to go to the hospital on saturday b/c i thought i had pnuemonia!

anyway, today I have an article due at fandango that i haven't even started since I was so sick and very busy watching maid in manhattan and coyote ugly!

last week i worked on a pilot at Paramount for NBC. I don't get paid in these situations, but usually they send a gift, we'll see. anyway, it was so much fun to be back on a set, pitching jokes, the only annoying thing were the people, well one writer in particualr who when he was off somewhere else and woudl come back and hear a joke someone had pitched while he was away he'd be like 'who said that who gets credit, who gets credit" and i realized I woudl hate to work with him. That's the competitive mentality i hate when working on a show. "who's joke was that. who gets credit" its susually a collaborative effort where someone pitches an area and then together everyone builds on it, but by pointing out who gets credit, it makes everyone else feel like they did nothing and the one who pitched the final wording is the genius. I swear i wanted to punch this guy in the face when he kepts saying it for 2 days straight. anyway, the show is really funny, and i hope gets on the air and i hope they hire me!!!!

celebrity sighting round up

I have a ton of celeb sightings!!!



on thurs I was driving by orso, a very actory type restaurant which is about 4 blocks from my house and I stopped because of traffic and looked over and saw Josh Jackson and his Girlfriend. Josh jackson who played pacey on dawson's creek. and let me just say he is looking MIGHTY FUCKING FINE!!!!! have you guys seen him lately?!?! yum yum, i wanted to lick him!!! but the light turned green and I had to go but DAMN!!




on saturday I was driving to my friend carrie's house when I drove by the park at coldwater canyon and saw all the paps lined up taking pics so I slowed down to see Gwen steffani with her son, pushing him on some two wheeler. she was all glam on an early sat. morn. By the time I had brunch and got home the pics of her day at the park were already up on people.com!!!



Just now I am currently staring at Eric Stolz from every 80s movie under the sun and once again may i say DAMN!! he's in the writers guild lounge for some reason. I looked over and there he was grabbing a bathroom key. he's in the small conference room with some people, i didn't recognize them, which means they're not regulars here as i have been given the title "mayor of the writers guild lounge!"

last night i went out for kristin's party, she sold her pilot which is good news for me since I helped her write it and if it gets picked up to series I'll have a job!! woo hoo! and then I can afford coffee again! oh yeah, since the sky rocketing pricetag of my accident and medical bills (from 2007) and car repairs, i have had to cut out coffee bean, 2 bucks a day instead of going to my gut goes to my credit card. so every 5 days i'm going to send a check via my bank to the credit card companies to help pay for stuff. ugh, being poor is a fucking nightmare!!

every day at the wrtiers guild there is a woman who comes to write and often sits across from me, well she sits a lot of places. moves aroudn the lounge she moves like 4 time a day sometimes twice in one hour. anyway, whenever she sits on the couches where is usually her first stop, she falls asleep. just sits there with her computer on her lap, eyes closed. this happens every day. and i watch her as her eyes slowly close and she tries to battle them to stay open but is unsuccesful, oh, right now she is up again, i'll keep you updated.

i've been sick for a week and I'm so tired! ugh! last night greg S drove me home from krisine's and then came inside to give me a pep talk about my life. he gave me some valuable advice about trying to figure out what i want to do with my life. well, not my life but what I want to do next. we shall see. I just wish someone would just tell me what to do, that would be so much easier. i hate being a grown up.

back in la!! went to emma's bachlorette party in SF this weekend with the rest of the bridesmaids and had a great time even though I had bronchitis and didnt get to go out as late as the rest of the girls. I'm still plagued with the illness as I'm too lazy to go see a doctor.

we toured the vineyards of napa in high style, a very tacky cheesy lame ass white limo that was PERFECT@! a freakin white limo, i didn't even know they made those anymore! we went to like 5 vineyards and at one my spot had about 10 empty champagne glassses! yeah, I was a bit faced! all the girls rallied to head out that night after a day of drinking, but I was too dizzy to stand let alone go to some bar so I stayed back and fell asleep watching bridget jones diary 2.

flew home sunday and have been in la since. I know am driving a rental car that i freakin hate, a ford focus which is a shit box but what can you do? I should get my car back next week, cannot wait, i miss it, but mostly because I left a whole bunch of laundry in it and now I don't have clean sock or my tennis racket which is in the truck! grrrr!! i didn't plan that well!

anyway, back to resting!!

so immediately after my accident last week my parents flew me home to NY. I just clarely had such a bad run of bad luck and I was so wound up and the pressure and stress and mental toll was all to much. I got into the acciddent at 2 called them around 3pm and was on a plane that night. My dad said i was so upset on the phone he thought I had killed someone. No, not someone, just someone's jaguar.

so i have been hiding out in ny recovering from whip lash and all my mental scarring. I'm glad I came home, turns out it was easter so I had a great time with my family and then started being spotted in my small town and in the church I go to and had to tell people I was home. It was fine, by then I was ready to get off my parents couch, although not behind a wheel. basically my friends just pick me up and drive me whereever they're going, i tag along. today I went swimming which i read is good for shoulder, neck and back injuries, so that felt good. my dad and I split a lane, hehe! pretty funny. we have matching goggles.

tonight my friend BJ and her kids and I went up to briarcliff to her sister cathy's sweet ass condo. I think one of my basketball coaches now works for the NBA pretty high up so i'm going to contact her about employment opporutnities there. Very excited about that. that should be cool. we had yummy spinach pizza tonight and played with the kids and gossiped about everyone we know. it's fun to do that with people you have known for over 15 years! it's not the same with the friends i've only had a few years, not that I dont cherish those relationships. I def. do, but still. anyway, I emailed with one of my friends today and he just gave me a great email reply when I told him I had to miss lunch b/c I was in ny due to this accident and my nervous breakdown, he said the nicest things, I just love getting those types of emails. Although now more and more I'm getting condolence emails and phone calls from people who are starting to hear about my accident etc as the news trickles out since I just picked up in left hours after the accident took place. lets see how nice they're going to be when they have to drive me everywhere when i go back to LA cause I'll be without a car for who knows how long. suck!

I WON THE LOTTERY

I bought a mega millions ticket the morning after my accident and guess what?!?! I WON!!! I WON THREE DOLLARS!! it's something right?!!?!?!

what should i spend it on? i dont want to spend it all on one place so as one would imagine that really narrows down my options. YIPPEE!!!

she's being aggressive

She's very AGGRESSIVE. this is what i just heard from my insurance company. My poor insurance compnay who i've only had for like 3 months and they have to deal with a COMPLETE lunatic that was involved in the accident with me. This woman was screaming at me and now i can only imagine what they're dealing with. As a result of this revelation and warning from my insurance company, i can no longer divulge information about the accident. Just know we were both at fault (my side) she on the other hand has a different view of the story. It's very complicated.

today was Good Friday, I've always wondered why it's called "Good Friday" since it's the day Jesus died. Actually I do know the answer, but it still bewilders me.

I would also like to apologize to my faithful readers who day after day come to my blog to read something witty or funny only to find out that I have suffered more bad luck, have slipped further into my depression and have completely lost the will to live. I'm sorry, I just can't seem to catch a break, I hope you know that since i'm reading "When Bad things happen to good people" (thanks mom!)... wel, I dont want to say I know I'm going to be okay and i'm going to get through this because if you scroll through my days it only keeps getting worse, but lets just leave it at that I'm reading this "when bad things happen to good people book," and that's that.

hmmm i guess the bird poop thing wasn't good luck after all. On monday I had a car repair for $1100. Tues I got a rejection letter for an entry level trainee job saying I didn't have the right qualifications!! FOR AN ENTRY LEVEL JOB and then on wednesday i got into a big car accident with a screaming lady, a lunatic insane lady who my insurance company told me today is being very "aggressive" with them and causing a lot of problems. (less than 24 hours after the accident) oh and a sassy black bus driver who first said I hit her bus too and then 10 mins later said "no wait you didn't hit my bus." so she's the "credible witness" for the entire case. Oh and i did happen to mention the botoxed lady was driving a brand new Jaguar?! yeah, awesome! I think I cried more yesterday than I have in... well only bout 2 weeks. but today is the first day of the rest of my life.

p.s. okay that is pic is not what happened!! oh and the $1100 car repair is gonna have to be completely redone! but it's okay, i'm gonna be ok and it could've been worse!! (at least that what some guy told me when he saw me standing by my car just staring at it glazed over about 30 mins after the accidnet)

good luck

I hear getting pooped on by a bird is good luck. any one have any idea what that is based on? I just got pooped on so I was curious!?@!

this week i went up to santa barbara with my cousin mo and her 2 girls to check out colleges for one of the girls. it was a small Christian college in montecito, so ridiculously beautiful and very very very small. I convinced Hannah to go to Pepperdine in Malibu, i wanted to go there but my parents were against it. check out the picture of this campus!!! come on!!! amazing. So that woudl be cool, hannah is a very cool girl. its weird to think that when she was 1 years old that was the last time I took a road trip with her and her parents, and now i'm road tripping with her TO COLLEGES!!!

life is going by waaaay too fast!

yesterday I went to a baby shower for my friend erika. it was reallllly nice of course, all my friends are TOTALLY RICH RICH RICH!! I am not. but that has been well established. anyway, she was opening presents and wondered where this one woman was who RSVP-ed and I was like I dont know her and she was like yes you do, you know Kerry Anderson and I was like no, I dont and this is how ther est of the conversation went.

Her: Kerry Anderson, you know Kerry Anderson. Kerry Anderson?
me: no I have no idea who she is
Her: Kerry Anderson. (turns to our friends) She's met Kerry Anderson right?
Jenny: yeah, you know Kerry Anderson she was at my shower
Me: i swear I dont know Kerry Anderson
Jenny: yes you do, she does, she met her at my shower
her: Kerry Anderson, you know her.
me: you can keep saying her name, but my answer isn't going to change.
Jenny: no, you know her, you just dont know it.

me: (in my head): oh, ok.???

Post tenebras spero lucem ("After darkness I hope for light")

Ive decided I'm no longer JOB from the Bible. Job is the guy who is repeatedly tested by God to see his faith and God gives him the most UNBELIEVABLE bad luck and just heaps it on him more and more and more and more, killing his wife and kids and taking away everything. For more info read about it here. ALL ABOUT BAD LUCK JOBFor most of 2 years now I've thought I was JOB, the modern day JOB, i do not have a wife and kids to take away but everything else I have had stripped from me.

But today I've decided I'm Lazarus, another Biblical character who Jesus rises from the dead, resurects, more like ressucitates. I have decided I am now Lazarus, I am on the rise.

TOday I picked up a mail from the actors house and found a medical bill, no surprsie there, I'm drowning in medical bills, this is one for $7,000 from 2005 when I was sick after Africa. My insurance woudln't pay it. I had 2 procedures done with a doctor in their network who did said procedures at a non-network place and they would only pay $3000 of the 10,000 so that left with me $7000. I told my doctor last year I couldn't pay it, and it wasn fair since I was using him a in network doctor that I should be penalized becaue he was using a non network surgery center for my stomach stuff. So he told me to fax him the bill and he'd try and work something out, i'd probably have to pay some of it, but not a of it. This is a doctor who I have developed a good report with seeing as I'm always in there with ailments that "only 65 year old men have, not women your ag" that's a direct quote. he was also the one who told me to go to the ER b/c I was having an appendicitis, needless to say this guy has watched the hits keep on coming with me. Anyway, it took a long time for me to get it togethet to mail the bill to him but I did and then never really heard anythign.

until today.

Like i said I went to the old homestead to pick up my mail and there was the bill from the surgery center. I thought for sure I was going to open it and see a figure that I wasn't too keen on paying but much to my surprise the leter said my balance was ZERO! nada, zilch, nothing!!!! My luck is changing! I still have thousands to pay for my medical bills last year, but this one bill was weighing on me for years!!!!!

woo hoo, I feel like I won the lottery, I am like the phoenix, I am rising from the ashes, I'm back in the high life again!

free screening

last night this guy i went on a date with in dec and a few more in jan called me out of the blue. he had disappeared in jan, (after the date where he called me at 830am to ask me to a free movie screening that night) only to send me an email in feb congratulating me that the strike was over and so i replied "i was wondering what happened to you" something to drive home my attitude of "WTF where did u go?" then i followed it up with yes, thanks for the email blah blah.

THEN NOTHING

then last night he called me at like 930pm to invite me to a screening (another one, it's the only thing he ever calls me to do, a free movie screening, he really knows how to make a girl feel special.) for 4pm today, but i was like Um I have to work.... and he said maybe we could get drinks after if i couldn't make the screening, but I already have plans!! WHO IS THIS GUY? HE CALLS LIKE 2 SECS BEFORE HE WANTS TO HANG OUT. now i know you're all thinking Jeez, give it a rest, at least he's calling, but honestly, a 16 hour notice isn't enough. I'm not saying i'm popular, but I don't see people alllll day long andit's really lonely so as a result I book my nights up way in advance becaues I need to see people and not feel so isolated, so i'm ususally booked up at least 10 days in advance. it's something I know i have to do to keep remotely sane! so i called him back today and left a message and haven't heard back. i'm sure in 3 weeks I"ll hear from him again!

WTF ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?

i handed in my pilot to my agents and they loved it but want me to do a re-write so we had a conference call yesterday and i've come out of it not understanding WTF they're trying to say. The thing about agents and TV execs is they get their job after answering a phone for a few years and then get promoted. The thing about writers is, they have to answer the phone for a few years BUT ALSO WRITE SCRIPTS AND IMPROVE THEIR CRAFT. you see the difference. In what other industry do people who answer the phone get promoted into a job that requires understanding of script development, story building, character?!?!? NO OTHER THAT'S WHY THERE IS SO MUCH BAD TV. the people who are giving notes HAVE NO EXPERIENCE DOING SO!!!! They're just trying to sound smart so as not to lose their job THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE IN THE FIRST PLACE. So sure agents listened in on all their bosses phone calls when they were assistants, so they hear phrases and words that execs and agents say that sound like they have meaning (they think the person on the other end knows what htey're talkinga bout) but really they're just saying a lot of words but it means nothing. I'm not sure you can fully understand this until you have had it happen to you.

so yesterday on the phone my agents said a lot of words but didn't really say anything concrete or of any value that will help me in my rewrite and this makes it difficult as one would imagine. I just want to be done with this script and send it out and maybe sell it (long shot, but crazier things have happened)

grey clouds are gonna clear up...

put on a happy face. I'm so exhausted putting on a happy face. but yet I continue to do so. all around me people I love are getting the craziest happiest news/experiences (most life changing, it's been quite a week for my friends: a new baby in boulder, an engagement in NYC!!)

yet the most exciting thing I did this week was floss.

And hope for my happy news!

a whole new life...

I know my last post was depressing and i can't help that, well i also thought it was hopeful, how i was coming up with new ideas to cut back. but despite that, i was just trying to convey how every single second of every single day of every single week of every single month the past 2 years of my existance has miserable!

but things are looking up! today I realized that all the hair that fell out ( 3 months after a surgery, most of your hair falls out) anyway, the hair is starting to sprout back in and IT'S NOT GREY!!!!!! so that's good since I do have a lot of grey hair, so i was quite pleased! yay!

I know some of you are thinking "get a job" I hope you all know that now that the strike is over that is exactly what I'm trying to do, it just sucks that my agents really old the power in my career. none of you have any idea what that is like! i feel powerless and lacking any control over my fate.

BUT MY VISION BOARD IS TOTALLY GOING TO CHANGE THAT! I'M LOOKIN AT IT NOW AND CAN'T WAIT FOR ALL THE GREAT THINGS THAT ARE GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME!!!!

it's a mad mad mad mad mad mad world

I hate it when i have a friend who is envious of "all the time off" i have. yes if I had a job lined up in a year from now and coudl travel, i'd be envious too, but I have a friend who recently said "i wish I had months and months off." so let me disabuse anyone of the notion that having off a ton of time with no end and no paycheck in sight is anything but glamorous. And let me tell you why... I do not have a family member or husband to swoop in and save the day to pay my $10,000 in medical bills and all my expenses, that must be nice! Here's how i live my life.

I have to steal toilet paper from businesses.
I have to steal $1 coupons from the coffee bean so I can afford my daily fix (only can go 4 times a week now since it adds up pretty fast)
I've had to cut up all my credit cards.
I have to bring a yogurt to my friends house during the acadmey awards party because I can't afford the pizza everyone else is ordering
I refill my gallon water bottles for 25 cents each at ralphs
I walk to church, coffee bean and the grocery store so to avoid using gas
i spend every waking hour coming up with ways to save money! it's exhausting.

my friend told me recently to do something and then i could deduct it for business expenses on my taxes i said to her "um deduct it from what? I've earned zero dollars, i believe you have to earn money in order to deduct it."

being a hollywood writer is not an easy life, so please no one at home try it!